once a marauder, always a marauder
by West Pharaoh
Summary: the entire story of the marauders from day one when they met, until the end. but there's a fifth. filled with hilarities, action, drama, and meaning. dont like peter so he won't have the biggest part, but he will be there. rating will change. review!
1. a bird gave it to me

Madelyn West was excited, to say the least. After going through hell and back, she was finally getting the second shot she had dreamed about. But there was just one problem; she didn't know how to get there.

She was at King's Cross Station, staring at platform nine and ten, trying to project the image of '9 ¾' between the two signs. Now, Madelyn had just gotten a letter about Hogwarts and platform nine and three quarters from and owl. _Technically_ this was her second letter— she had originally gotten one for a school in America, but she had flown herself to England.

_Well_, Madelyn thought, _it's really no surprise the officer didn't help you out when you said Hogwarts_. _He would have sent you to a lovely padded cell if you said anything else. I can hear it now "No, please, sir, a bird gave it to me." Ha ha._

Madelyn stood, ready to leave and get herself back to America when she heard a man say, "Now I know Hogwarts might sound scary—"

Madelyn whipped around. It was a man talking to a boy who was probably his son. They both were a bit shabby looking and had sandy blond hair; the boy's was longer than the father's. Madelyn marched right up to them, "Wait, sir, did you just say Hogwarts?"

"Uh…"

"Can you tell me how to get to the platform?"

Relieved, smile broke out on his face, "Oh, are you new?" he gestured to his son. "Remus is new as well. Don't worry; all you have to do if walk into the wall."

Madelyn raised a skeptical eyebrow at him. "That's it?"

"Yep." He said cheerily.

Madelyn did a head shrug where she gave a small nod of her head to the left and lifted her chin. _What the heck, it's magic._ "Well alright then."

She pushed her cart ahead of herself as she walked towards the wall. Before she knew it, Madelyn was on platform nine and three quarters.

The boy popped out of the wall behind her and smiled at Madelyn. She smiled back, "Hi, it's Remus right?"

He nodded unsurely.

"I'm Madelyn. Want to go find a seat?"

Remus smiled tentatively, "sure."

They helped each other get their trunks onto the train and walked down the aisle. All of the seats were full; until they saw two people leave a compartment. One was a boy with greasy dark hair and the other a fiery redheaded girl. They both look pretty miffed about something.

When Madelyn and Remus stopped outside the compartment they saw two boys laughing inside.

Madelyn gestured towards the compartment. "Everywhere else is full," she said to Remus, who looked like he was folding inward.

When the duo walked in, the two boys looked at them. "Hi," said Madelyn. "Can we sit here?"

"Sure," one of them said. He had dark hair that was flying all over the place, hazel eyes, and glasses, "my name's James, and this is Sirius."

"Hey, I'm Madelyn, and this is Remus." The boy all nodded hellos.

"Hey, what's up with your accent? You sound like you're-"

"American?" Madelyn cut in. "that's because I am. I'm also muggle-born."

"Sweet, my parents will love that!"

"Huh?"

"I have messed-up parents with this pure-blood mania. They'll be furious that I'm friends with a muggle-born. What are you?" he asked Remus.

"Half-blood."

"Yes, bonus!"

"Wait a minute, who's your parents?" James asked.

Sirius looked him in the eye, "I'm a Black."

A look of pure shock appeared on James' face, "Again, I thought you were alright!"

They both laughed.

"So," Madelyn asked, " What's Hogwarts like?"

"Awesome!" James said. "I mean, I haven't been there yet, but it'll be amazing!"

Before they could say anything else, they were interrupted by the trolley lady, "Would you like anything from the trolley?"

"Alright!" James said, hopping right up. All of the boys followed him, including Remus, who just wanted chocolate.

"Wait," James said, looking back at Madelyn, who was sitting forlornly in her seat. "Don't you want anything?"

Madelyn shifted uncomfortably, "I don't have any money. I'm muggle-born, remember? Everything I own is already second-hand."

James stared at her before turning abruptly to the lady. "We'll take the entire cart please."

For the next few hours, the four of them shared the entire cart of candy while James and Sirius took it upon themselves to "instruct her in the art of "quiddage" while Remus sat and read in the corner. Eventually they roped him into the conversation when they started to talk about the houses, but he was still rather quiet. Sirius and James wanted to be in Gryffindor, Remus wanted to be in Ravenclaw or Gryffindor, and Madelyn didn't really care, but so far Gryffindor sounded the most fun.

Minutes before they arrived at Hogwarts, they frantically threw there robes on, and hurried out.

"Firs years, firs years, over here," shouted a giant man with a wild beard.

"Who is that?" Madelyn asked.

"Hagrid," James said. "He's the gamekeeper."

"And how do you know this?" Sirius asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"I have _connections. _I'm _special." _

"Special in the head." Remus muttered behind them, which made the other two laugh. James pouted.

They followed Hagrid down to a giant lake that had a black sheen. The four of them were in a boat together when they took off. James and Sirius leaned over the edge and started to whisper, "I hear there's a giant squid in there…"

Looking at the two of them scanning the water, Madelyn saw an opportunity too good to miss. She turned toward Remus, "hold your breath!" before the confused boy could respond, Madelyn grabbed the edge of the boat and heaved.

The resulting splash caused every single person on the lake to turn and look at the visible bottom of the boat and the mass of bubbles coming up. Under the water, invisible the four children faced each other eyes open, and their hair forming haloes around them. The boys glared at Madelyn, who tried her best to look innocent under water before they all swam up. They expertly flipped the boat back over and climbed in.

"You three all righ'?" Hagrid asked

"Yes," they all responded.

"What was that for?" James growled out, murderous.

"It was funny! The looks on your faces…"

The boys could not argue with her _infallible_ logic.

The four continued to splash each other but where relatively silent for the rest of the ride. The group of first years walked into the school to meet up with a stern teacher who began to speak: "Welcome to Hogwarts, I am Professor McGonagall. Soon you will walk into the great hall and be sorted into one of four houses: Slytherin, Ravenclaw, Huffelpuff, or Gryffindor. While at Hogwarts, houses are family, good deeds will give you house points, rule-breaking is the opposite," she paused to give a disdainful look at Sirius, James, Remus, and Madelyn, whose sopping clothes left a trail on the floor. "Your sorting will start soon. I will return for you when it's time."

After she left, muttering broke out. "What do we have to do to be sorted?" Madelyn asked.

James shrugged, "dunno, I think we have to fight a troll."

Madelyn did her weird side-shrug-nod-thing. "Cool!... What's a troll?"

Before they answered, McGonagall came back. "We're ready. Follow me."

The four new friends looked at each other. "Here we go," said Sirius.


	2. the sorting

**Frozen pickle creator: thanks for reviewing! Thanks for telling me about the pine. My bad. **_**Oh well.**_** Sorry it took forever to update, but things were hectic around here**

** Hope everyone likes the chapter. Not going to make a song, sorry. **

** Don't own harry potter.**

** Enjoy!**

Oh, crap! Madelyn thought. Slytherin is cunning and ambitious? Well, she mentally gave a snort. Good byyyee Gryffindor.

Some Abbott kid went to hufflepuff as the first sorting. After a girl called Barres went to Hufflepuff as well, McGonagall called out, "Black, Sirius."

Sirius turned to give a quick smile and eyebrow raise to the others, whispering, "Here I go!"

"Go get'em, mate," James whispered. Sirius walked up to the hat confident. His face appeared calm, poised, and cocky, but if you were watching carefully, and knew him well enough, (which James, Madelyn, and Remus did not at the time) you could see a brief sliver of panic slip through his facade as the hat was placed on his head. _Well,_ thought the hat to Sirius. _A Black_.

An image involving the hat and a flamethrower passed through Sirius' mind.

_Hey, now there's no need for that!_ The hat thought quickly. _It's interesting, while you have some of their traits; Slytherin is not right for you. No, you have daring, and wit. You also now fear and respect it. Those put together equal bravery. _The sorting hat suddenly gave a shout, "GRYFFINDOR!"

Grinning, broadly, Sirius gave the hat to the professor and walked to the Gryffindor table. The hall was in a full out, stunned silence.

James began to clap. Then Remus and Madelyn joined in. soon there was uproar from the great hall, except for one entire table. The Slytherins sat in a furious silence, glaring at Sirius. If looks could kill… it probably didn't help when Sirius gave a "what now?" gesture to his family members.

When the hall quieted down, McGonagall continued with the sorting. Amelia bones went to Ravenclaw. Half of the kids were ignored or blanked-out upon by Madelyn. Lily Evans, the red head Remus and Madelyn saw leave the compartment earlier, went to Gryffindor, along with Mary MacDonald, Mary Kindfind, Alice Pruitt, and Vachel Dare. Severus Snape, the boy who left the compartment, went to Slytherin with an Avery, Mulciber, and Nott.

When Remus had gone up to the sorting hat, he looked uneasy, worried vulnerable, and young, Madelyn noticed.

_Hmm, a werewolf,_ the hat thought. _Ravenclaw, perhaps? No, that's not it. I know,_ GRYFFINDOR!

Remus politely gave the sorting hat to professor McGonagall before walking to the Gryffindor table with a look on his face.

When James went to the hat it was on his head for a second before it said, "GRYFFINDOR!"

Peter Pettigrew joined them at the table later after a bit of a wait with the hat.

Madelyn was second to last when "west, Madelyn," was called. She walked up.

_ Well you could fit into any house, but finding where you belong will be the trick_, thought the sorting hat. _Slytherin? You could be one of them. In fact you could be a princess there. But no, you will be needed in Gryffindor. It is where you belong._ "GRYFFINDOR!"

Madelyn joined her friends as the sorting finished and Dumbledore stood and announced where they couldn't go in the castle. James made a mental note to make sure they went there sometime this week. Dumbledore finished by saying, "oddity, ripple, spoinkle, and spork. Thank you." Everyone cheered and dug in to the feast that appeared before them.

About halfway through James spoke, "this is excellent. We can spend seven years here causing mayhem and mischief while we bathe ourselves in our own infamous glory as we rule the school."

Remus smiled, "you make it sound like we're marauders, James."

"Well, then, that's what we will be. From henceforth, we are the marauders," he said, raising his glass.

"I'll drink to that," Madelyn said, raising her own. "Brothers forever, here's to the marauders"

Sirius touched his glass of pumpkin juice to hers. "Cheers."

They all touched their glasses and drank before Remus said, "And here's to Hogwarts."

"Round one!" Madelyn added, and they all touched their glasses again.

Eventually, the feast ended and everyone went to their common room. The entrance was through a portrait of a fat lady in a pink dress. "Metamorphous Myse," the prefect said as the password.

Madelyn left the other newly-found marauders to go up to her dorm. The boys went up to their own with another boy who was fat and had rather watery eyes. They barely noticed him. Exhausted, they fell into their beds. They almost were asleep when the door opened and a head popped in.

"Psst, hey guys?"Madelyn whispered as she entered their room.

"Madelyn?" James asked.

"Can I crash here tonight? Some of the other girls are bitchy."

"Yeah sure."

Madelyn dumped two blankets and a pillow on the floor and laied down. In the dark, everyone wad their own secret smile. In less than five minutes, everyone, even Madelyn and Remus, who had a hard time falling asleep most of the time, as dead asleep.

**Thank you for reading this! Hope you like it, get others to read it, and REVIEW!**

**Give me as many ideas as you can, this long story has quite a ways to go, so please. Pranks, plots, twists, and drama. Although there's quite a bit of that it the fourth year.**

** REVIEW!**

**-west **


	3. day one

**Yes, I know this took awhile, but I think it was worth it! If you see something weird, sorry, my computer is funky. Don't own harry potter. Enjoy!**

When the mourning came, Madelyn had already woken up, gone back to the girls dorm, gotten ready, and came back. She quickly woke the others.

"Come on you guys, time for school!" Madelyn shouted while opening the curtains on both the windows and their beds. She whipped the covers off. "Come on, you don't want to miss breakfast, do you?"

"What the… Madelyn?" James groaned.

Sirius buried his head into his pillow, saying, "light bad. Dark good."

Madelyn grabbed hold of Sirius's ankle and pulled. Sirius' hand held fast to his bed post. "Come on Sirius, your making me feel like I'm your mother or something." When it was clear she wouldn't be getting him to move, she let go, saying, "you know what fine!" she walked to the bathroom, got a bucket full of water, and threw it on Sirius.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!" Sirius screamed. "You're ruining my hair!"

James, who had been getting ready, was pulling on his shoe, but fell over laughing when he heard this. "Ow," he said when Sirius threw a shoe at him, nailing him in the head.

Madelyn opened the curtains of another bed to wake Remus, only to find herself face-to-face with a plump little blond boy. There was a second when all they did was blink before both Madelyn and the boy opened their mouths and screamed. Well, actually it was the boy who screamed, Madelyn just gave a one-second shout since she didn't know how to scream

"Who the heck are you?" Madelyn asked when he had finished.

"P-peter p-pet-Pettigrew. This is my d-dorm," he made it sound like a question mark was at the end of the fact.

"Well, then," Madelyn said, extending her hand, "I'm Madelyn West, nice to meet you."

Peter stared at her hand questioningly, with a bit of fear, as if it would bite him.

"You shake it."

Peter shook her hand.

Since they were all quite hungry, Madelyn quickly started on waking Remus up, while Sirius took the shower he insisted upon.

"Geez, Sirius, you're almost as bad as me!" Madelyn said when he came out after fifteen minutes. "And at least I have the excuse of being a girl!"

This sent James back into a fit of laughter. When he finished, they started to leave. "Wait, what about Remus?"

"He sleeps like he's dead. I figure the smell of food would wake him up, so we'll bring back some."

They all had a delicious breakfast, Sirius ate pancakes, James had waffles, Madelyn had four cinnamon rolls, and peter who sat next to them had some of everything. They brought Remus sausage, biskets, and eggs and waved the plate under his nose until he woke up. In five minutes they were all headed to Herbology.

In Herbology, Mrs. Sprouts was a young looking witch who was generally good-natured. She split the children into groups of two and sent them to a pot. Sirius was with James, while Madelyn was with Remus. All they did was plant seeds for an hour, and were allowed to talk, but at the end, James' and Sirius' attention was beginning to drift.

The four of them left together. None of them noticed peter following them from behind. "So what do we have now?" Remus asked Madelyn, who was the unelected Holder of the Schedules.

"Double potions," she answered, "with the Slytherins."

James grimaced. "They say Professor Slughorn has favorites. He throws parties for them on occasion."

"Fun."

When they found their way to the potions room, the four sat at a table with two cauldrons. A fat man with a walrus mustache walked in. "hello, class, I am professor Slughorn. Now, in this class you will be learning," he spoke slowly, drawing out words every now and then, "about potions brewing. Since I have two hours with you, we will be starting on a rather simple concoction. You will be working with a partner on a healing potion that is rather weak, and used only for bruises. The instructions can be found on page seven in your books, ingredients, in the cupboards up front."

When Slughorn finished his speech, there was a brief hustling where everyone hurried to get started. As they began, Slughorn gave roll call. At several names he would stop and talk to the student about some relative of theirs that he new. He noticed some marauders, "a black in Gryffindor, how interesting, I will be watching you…" this had Sirius and James exchanging looks. "Ooo, a potter, I knew your father, how is he?" Madelyn went unnoticed, but Remus got a funny look.

When there was about half an hour left, James gave Sirius a nudge. When Sirius turned to look at him, James showed him a fire work in his hand under the table. James nudged his bag with his foot so that Sirius could see the pack of filibuster's fireworks he had in it while wearing an innocent look on his face. When the two boys looked at each other again, they both had evil grins. Looking around, they say the two kids who had left their train compartment. What were their names…Millie and snivillous? They were working together on a cauldron that was wide open to the two boys…

About ten seconds later, there was and explosion in the front of the room. Several boys and girls screamed, lily herself shrieked. Everyone in the front within seven feet of the potion were drenched and had some burns. Lily and Snape had some bruises as well.

Slughorn sent everyone to the hospital wing, giving Severus and Lily a worried look, as if he thought they were so awful, they would blow up everything. Then he went over and vanished the potion. A look of shock appeared on his face as he picked up the firework.

"Who did this?" Slughorn asked, holding the firework high. He scanned all the faces, "well?"

James and Sirius would have gotten away with it, if they hadn't looked at each other. As soon as they did, they started to snigger, and then a full out laugh. Slughorn walked up to them.

"Well boys, I am very disappointed with you. This was very immature and irresponsible," the professor lectured. He opened his mouth to continue, but was interrupted.

"What, Snivellus had it coming!" James said.

"Excuse me?"

Sirius this time, "what part didn't you get? The 'Snivellus' or the 'had it coming'?"

Slughorn closed his eyes and looked like he had a headache. Eventually he said to the boys who were wearing matching grins, "ten points from Gryffindor. I'm sorry boys, but there's nothing else I can do. You brought this upon yourself. Class dismissed."

As the marauder walked out, Sirius and James had a bounce in their step. Sirius, who was practically skipping, said, "That was _excellent_! I can't wait to do it again! What class is next?"

"Nothing, its lunch for us," Madelyn replied.

James laughed as Sirius' face fell. "Whatever did you blow up the potion for?" Remus asked them.

"Weren't you listening when we told Sluggy? Snivellus had it coming!"

"No, what did they do?"

James looked at lost, until he figured a one size fits all solution, "he bugs me."

Sirius agreed, "His hair is really greasy, it's like he doesn't know what shampoo is."

Remus sighed while Madelyn rolled her eyes.

When they reached the great hall, James had an idea, "we should prank them!"

"Who?"

"The Slytherins!"

"Ok. How?"

James paused there, "uh, I don't know. What day do we have open?"

Madelyn consulted her papers, "Friday. After lunch we get the afternoon off."

"What?" Sirius looked annoyed. "Today is Monday, and we're planning for Friday? Can't we do it sooner?"

Madelyn looked at the schedule, "ok, then, Wednesday. After charms we can set things up, go to astronomy at midnight, and launch the plan. It will take effect in the morning."

James had a big smile across his thin face, "brilliant! What should we do?"

While they ate lunch, they planned. The first prank of the marauders would have to be simple, they didn't know any magic.

"How will we let them know that we did it?" James asked.

"That we did it?" Remus looked shocked. "Why would we want them to know that we did it?"

James looked confused, "to help build a legacy. To start our reign of this school. _Duh_."

Since they looked ready to get at it, Sirius interrupted, "wait, wait, wait, wait, hold on a hot second," he said, causing Madelyn to snicker. She quickly covered it with a cough when Sirius turned to look at her. "You're arguing on whether or not we should sign our pranks? Seriously? Well, no, of course you're not Sirius, I am."

Madelyn looked at him with a painful expression, "please never use that joke again."

Sirius ignored her. "Well, this is easy, I got an idea."

XxXxXxXxX

The three marauders walked to transfiguration exchanging evil grins. They sat in a row, Remus in the front, James in the back behind Sirius. Professor McGonagall walked in and began to give a speech about how to behave.

"-and anyone who does othe… yes Mr. Black?"

Sirius brought his hand down snappishly; the way he was acting was like a teacher's pet. He was sitting very proper in an obvious way, "Professor McGonagall is it true that your first name is Minerva?"

McGonagall's head was tilted to the side and she had an incredulous look on her face as she stared at Sirius. McGonagall heaved a sigh, "yes, Mr. Black. Now as I was… yes Mr. Black?"

"What was that sigh for? Do you not like your name?"

She sighed again, "Mr. Black whether I like my name or not is inconsequential and none of your business. So stop asking irrelevant questions and pay attention."

She took a breath to continue with her lecture, but lost it when Sirius piped up again to say, "Okay, Minnie."

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

The marauders were sitting in chairs waiting for professor McGonagall to return to tell them what their detention would be. Madelyn was talking, "I just don't understand. How did your annoying McGonagall-"

"Annoying?" James interrupted, "he was driving her crazy!"

Madelyn paused, but continued, "How did your annoying McGonagall get all of us detention?"

Sirius was frowning, "I can't believe no one has called her Minnie before."

Remus rolled his eyes, "Slughorn probably told her that they had blown up a potion. Teachers gossip like old ladies. But that doesn't mean Madelyn and I should be here, we didn't do anything!"

James turned on Remus, "oh you're just saying that because we got detention. Okay, we were all there! As soon as she told me and Sirius to go to her office we _all_ started_ screaming_ that you can't separate us how if one of us falls we all do! All of that sentimental crap."

Remus stood up and he and James started shouting at each other. Sirius and Madelyn stood up and they were all yelling when McGonagall walked in.

"That is enough!" she shouted. "You-"

Ah, just for the record," Madelyn said with her finger held up and her head moving in sass, "I was not screaming. I don't know how to scream, and I haven't for over seven years."

This caused another shouting match until James spoke to McGonagall, "look professor, just make it easier on yourself and tell us what our detention is."

"Fine, on Tuesday and Thursday you will meet with Mr. Flitch to clean the trophy room from five to seven. Don't be late," and with that, she stood and walked out.

They all sat in silence watching their professor storm out until Sirius broke the silence, clapping his hands together, "well, at least something good came of this. We've missed Defense against the Dark Arts!"

***********inside my head***************

**Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhh, how nice. What do you think Split-Personality-Number-1?**

Still needs pranks.

**Hey, I'm getting there. Its only day one and they still got a detention! Geez! Anyway, how about you, Split-Personality-Number-two?**

_Well, it is only day one and its good, but it still needs the drama! I can't wait until year three and four!_

Sirius- I think it needs more me.

**How did you even get in here? Go! Out!**

James- needs more me, too.

**Shaddap! How did you get in my head anyway?**

Remus- Why, west, whatever do you mean? We are in your head, because we are your head.

**Ah! I feel like I'm in some Disney movie! Get out of my head!**

Sirius- but west, don't you love us?

**That is not the point! You're obsessed with your hair.**

Sirius- …says the girl who has a name for her hair.

**But you're a guy, and I'm a girl. Besides, Vanessa has a mind of her own! She's untamable!**

Sirius-a… you smell funny!

**Yo…a…th… … … OUT!**


	4. just an ordinary day

**Know, I know, I took forever, I know. But really, could you argue that this was **_**my**_** fault?**

Split personality number 1: oh, yes, absolutely.

_Split personality number 2: uh-huh._

**Yes, well… that would be a **_**safe **_**argument… umm… well…**

Just get on with it!

**You know, I should really stop calling you guy's split personality number 1 and 2, you need a name.**

_I fully agree, but first just get on with the freaking chapter!_

**Alright, alright, just, stop yelling, I'm on it, Yesh!**

_Both: NOW!_

xXxXxXxXx

The marauders were at breakfast. They were eating the same food as usual, except not as much, and they all seemed happy. Peter was about five seats down and was shooting them occasional glances. Lily Evans was down even further, but that didn't stop her from shooting the marauders glares. The marauders were oblivious to them both.

In fact, the marauders were in a perfect mood. They felt like the day was going to be great; they didn't know it was all about to go down hill.

James was just starting on his third stack of pancakes when the mail came in. there weren't as many as there usually was since term had only just started. There was a large, dark eagle owl sailing straight towards the marauders, with a red envelope on his talons.

James nudged Sirius who was just putting a bite in his mouth. "Mate," James said, pointing at the owl.

Sirius paled.

"You've got a howler," Remus said nervously when the owl landed.

Sirius took the letter. The owl's dark, evil looking eye was leering at Sirius, who was staring him down in an intense staring contest, even as the howler began to smoke in his hand.

Madelyn was looking around at the boys, "What's a howler?"

"You're about to find out," Sirius said as he opened it. "Be sure to plug your ears."

A prodigious screech filled the hall, making almost all of the students cover their ears, "_SIRIUS ORION BLACK!_ HOW _DARE YOU_ BEFOUL THE VERY NAME OF THE NOBLE AND ANCIENT HOUSE OF BLACK? GRYFFINDOR? YOU ARE A _DISCRASE! _YOU ARE EVEN WORSE THAN THAT FIFTHY WOMAN YOU CALL YOUR COUSIN! YOU ARE THIS CLOSE TO BEING DISOWNED, SO IF YOU DO ANYTHING THAT COULD ASHAME US, ANYTHING _AT ALL_ AND YOU WILL BE OUT OF THIS FAMILY AND _DAMNED_ FOR ALL WE CARE! DON'T EVEN _BOTHER _WITH COMING HOME THIS HOLIDAY. DO NOT DISHONOR OUR FAMILY. A GRYFFINDOR LIKE YOU IS A SCRAP OF _SCUM_ ON OUR LIFE. DO _ANYTHING_, AND YOU WILL BE EASILY DISPOSED OF." And with that, the howler burst into flame.

James whipped around on the bench to glare at the Slytherins, who were looking very satisfied and smug with smirks on their faces. James turned back to the other marauders, "well, that went well!"

Sirius gave a small, dry laugh, "James, she doesn't even know about the potion or the detention yet!"

A minute later, the four marauders walked out of the great hall. All of them had glares for the Slytherins, but Madelyn, being the true American that she was, also sent them a middle finger before the doors shut behind them, leaving several scandalized faces in the hall from every house.

xXxXxXxXx

The marauders were at charms, their first class. Sitting in a row in the order of Remus, Madelyn, James, and Sirius, who was in the very back. Sirius passed a note up to James.

We need a nick-name for all of the teachers, but for filius flitwick, I've got nothing. - SB

James tapped his chin seriously thinking.

I dunno. Midget? –JP

James passed it up to Madelyn, who gave it to Remus, without reading any of it since she was in the middle of reading their entire text book. After quickly scanning it, Remus rolled his eyes.

That is incredibly offensive. You do realize that were actually supposed to respect the teachers, right. –RL

Remus passed the note back to Madelyn and continued to take notes about wand movements. Madelyn pulled her head out of the middle of the book to read the paper. A smile broke out on her face.

**But where is the fun in that? I say… Filly Cheese Steak. You know, instead of Philly Cheese Steak. –MW**

James took the note and turned around to face Sirius' desk, where they read it together. When done, they looked up at each other with a _huh? _Look.

"What?" James asked.

Sirius shook his head. Grabbing the paper, he crumpled it up and threw it with perfect aim at the back of Madelyn's head. She turned around, "what?"

"What's a Philly Cheese Steak?"

"A delicious sandwich found only in America. They're fabulous."

Sirius turned to look at James, "well, alright, that's a possibility."

xXxXxXxXx

Transfiguration was surprisingly smooth. Professor McGonagall settled with shooting the marauders a dirty look before teaching the lesson as if nothing had happened the day before. She spent the lesson teaching them how to change needles to grass.

"What's the point of this? There's no use for this spell," Madelyn whispered to James.

He had an evil grin, "well then I guess that's something the marauders will have to change come Friday."

xXxXxXxXx

After transfiguration, the marauders had a free period and were headed to the common room to sit in some very comfortable chairs. They had just reached the common room when they were met by an angry-looking red-head.

James' eyes kept flickering back-and-forth between the girl and the seats that all the other marauders had their eyes on, "oh, um… hi…um… Millie Evans… um… can you, like, move so we can like-"

"Excuse me?" the red-head looked _furious_ now. "Okay, first of all, my name is_ Lily Evans, _NOT Millie! And then, WHAT was that yesterday? Professor McGonagall is the head of our house! And you're just going to insult her like that and lose us points! We could lose the house cup because of you ridiculous little-" and on she went. Everyone who was actually in the common room was staring at the marauders and a certain red-head that was a newly named _Lily_ Evans, who was screaming, and shouting, and shrieking, and just about any other loud noise coming from the mouth starting with an _s_ that James could think of. It was starting to give James a headache.

When Lily paused for breath she made a mistake. She closed her eyes and bowed her head, making herself vulnerable and unaware. Sirius saw an opening and took it. Using the brilliant stiff-arm move, Sirius pushed lily straight over a couch back and onto the seat. He then took off towards his favorite chair, the other marauders quickly following suit.

They were all laughing with the rest of the common room when they collapsed onto the chairs.

Madelyn looked at Sirius, "you know, that wasn't very nice, but I have to admit, it was pretty funny to watch lily's face."

That caused another round of laughter before Sirius added; "it was almost as red as her hair!" everyone snorted and giggled.

"Hey, do you ever think we'll have an ordinary day here?" Remus asked.

James cocked his head to the side, "what do you mean, I thought this was ordinary." This caused more giggles.

"We will never be board!" Sirius drawled out loudly, throwing his head back.

Madelyn smiled, "still, I propose we make Monday a lazy day. We can still do pranks, but we have to be lazy."

"Amen to that," James said. "After all, Sirius needs his beauty sleep."

The marauders all burst out laughing.

xXxXxXxXx

The marauders were at their detention. All four of them were scrubbing the trophies in the trophy case in the Trophy Room. _Wow,_ Sirius thought. _Hogwarts sure does come up with _very _creative names._

After they were done with polishing, they began to clean the glass casing. Filch left them alone to do that. Jams looked around slyly before picking up a soaking, soapy sponge. James quickly took aim and launched it at Sirius with perfect aim hitting his target; right on the back of Sirius' head, snapping it forward. Right smack dab, in Sirius' hair.

Sirius slowly raised his head. His face was livid. James was on _very_ dangerous ground. If it was anyone but his best mate, Sirius would have gone complete death star on that person for even thinking about messing with his hair. Sirius snapped is sponge off through the air to the side. Picking up his bucket of soapy water, Sirius walked up behind James, who turned around just in time for Sirius to watch his face as he dumped the entire bucket on James' head.

As the two friends glared at each other, they forgot to watch their back. You see, when Sirius threw his sponge to the side earlier, he didn't even notice where it went. The yellow sponge had flown with a fair amount of force to nail Remus in the side of the face. Poor Sirius.

_Remus truly is a genius_, Madelyn thought, watching. When the sponge had hit Remus, he had looked straight at the two friends glaring at each other, his eyes narrowed. Madelyn pushed her bucket over to Remus, smiling at him. He gave her an evil smile for a partner in crime.

Now Remus was standing at the side of James and Sirius. In both hands he had a bucket, and he swung them in such a way that the water splashed the back of the boy's heads and the bucket sides smacked them as well. When James and Sirius turned to look at their friend he had a satisfied and cocky smile on his face before putting the buckets over their heads like a mask. Remus then walked over to Madelyn, who had gotten two new buckets, and innocently cleaning.

It was then that all hell broke lose. Everyone was throwing sponges, hurling buckets, and whipping soap at each other. Madelyn somehow fond herself a hose and was owning everyone, but then all of the boys teamed up on her. Eventually things calmed down enough for them to hear Filch begin to walk towards the trophy room. The marauders quickly went out to meet him, making sure the door was shut.

"Well?" the caretaker's voice was somewhere between a wheeze and a growl as he eyed their soaking robes.

"It's clean, sir."

"Well can I be the judge of that?"

"Of course," the marauders all moved out of the way of the door. Filch walked in.

Water was dripping from the ceiling and running down the glass casing. Bubbles were filling the room in piles, mostly where the floor met the wall or casing. There was five inches on water covering the floor, causing the buckets to float and bob while the sponges drifted. Filch's face turned red and his body began to shake. He turned around and ripped the door open, with his mouth open ready to yell. But the marauders were already gone, with a trail of water behind them.

xXxXxXxXx

The marauders were hurrying down the hall with their shoes squeaking like crazy. They just couldn't stop laughing, or flicking water at each other for that matter.

"Okay, we need to find a Slytherin to follow, remember?" Madelyn said when she caught her breath.

They went down to the dungeons. It was hard to find any students, since it was after curfew, but they eventually did find a Slytherin fourth- year, who eventually led then to a portrait.

"Higher-race." Was the password.

Sirius settled his weight on his heals letting out his breath. All of the sneaking around was hard and annoying. They were all pretty good, but they still had some close calls. "Alright, now let's go back to the common room, I'm tired."

They had taken off their shoes to keep from making noise, so after putting them back on, they began to head to their common room.

They had gone up a few levels when they herd Filch's wheezing behind them. The marauders quickly dove behind a tapestry.

"Sniff around, my sweet."

_Oh, shit, he's got a cat!_ Sirius thought. _We're doomed._

And they would have been, if not for a crash coming down the stairs to the floor they were all on. What looked like a big wood box in the dark came to a stop next to filch.

"Peeves!" the caretaker shouted. "This vanishing cabinet in incredibly valuable! I'll have your head for this. The headmaster will deal with you and let me get rid of you, mark my words!"

An ancient looking large jar was thrown at him from mid-air in response.

Cursing, the man walked away to what the marauders assumed was the headmaster's office.

Remus walked out from behind the tapestry, "Peeves, he's the school poltergeist. We're lucky he was here."

Sirius followed Madelyn out, "that guy is pervertedly in love with his cat, and yet he's in a school full of children. I don't know what Dumbledore was thinking when he hired him."

Madelyn was about to respond when James voice came from behind the tapestry, "hey, guys check this out."

They came back behind the curtain. "I think we just found a secret passageway," he continued.

"Whoa."

"Come on, let's check it out!"

Remus stopped James, "hold on a minute, why now, we have no light don't know where it does, or how long we'll be down there."

Sirius spoke around a yawn, "yeah, I'm all for checking it out, but I'm tired. Cant we go to bed?"

James' face was falling, so Madelyn said comfortingly, "we have a free period tomorrow morning and Thursday afternoon."

James sighed in defeat. "This is the only time we can blow something like this off."

xXxXxXxXx

**TADAA! What do you think?**

_Very nice, can't wait for the next!_

Where did the hose come from?

**What? Just because they're inside doesn't mean there aren't hoses.**

… Whatever. Ok, now actually listen to me, you need more action! Seriously!

Sirius- well then, it's a good thing I'm here then!

**AHH! HOW DO, YOU KEEP GETTING IN? SERIOUSLY?**

S- Well, how else would I have gotten in?

James- I thought you had already established this. By the way mate, that's a really old joke. A really old, really _bad_ joke.

**Geez, this is what tells me I am really losing it, when I'm arguing with myself, and screaming at some people with British accents. I can't even remember what I needed to say…**

Remus- why don't you let me help with that?

**Oh, hi, Remus, how are you?**

J- oh, sure, _Remus_ gets a polite voice with good manners, but we only get angry-

QUIET!

R-… I'm good thanks, and you were going to explain to ice-

**Oh yeah! Ok, ice, and I'm only going to call you that because I'm lazy, but I know I promised to send you this, but I couldn't FIND you. And I know I messed up somewhere in this bigger-than-usual chapter, so I hope you are reading this. I saw your account before, but Google won't let me near it anymore, so…**

And nobody better even DARE mention bing, because that _thing_ sucks, and won't let us find anything.

S- Hey, why does the chapter make james seam more macho and bad-ass than-

**ENOUGH! I AM MORE KICK-ASS THAN ANY OF YOU- YOU WHO NOW STAND BEFORE ME IN ALL MY BAD-ASS GLORY! THE ONLY ONE OF YOU WHO EVEN COME CLOSE TO ME IS REMUS, SO SHUT UP!**

…

…

…

**#2, take it away.**

_Hello, everyone, I am west's mare feminine side with manners, who is also the bitchy part. #1 is the down-right tomboy who used to rule this place, and no one knew me. But recently I have made myself known. So if you would be so kind, please click on that lovely-_

You forgot to add that I'm the bad-ass part as well, and the button isn't lovely, it's just awesomely blue. So you-

**Guys! Just review, alright? Spare me them!**

Bye!

_Love ya!_


	5. setting up

**IM BACK! TADAA!**

…

…

…

…

…you

**Uh… look I… it wasn't…**

FOUR WEEKS! IT TOOK YOU FOUR FREAKING WEEKES TO EVEN START ON THIS CHAPTER!

**I'M SORRY! I was delving into old stories and authors and had an epiphany- sort of- and that reminds me- I need to see if I can find the Scandalous story-**

_NO! No more stories! That's for later! And you still have to do your homework!_

**Damn homework, its summer, all the grades have to do a corrupt government because we "read too much fiction". That's impossible! I've got an excellent argument I've been working on and-**

_STORY!_

**Shout out to a very special reviewer!**

**Recently people have been reviewing and adding this story to favorites and such, but there is someone I would like to nominate…**

**Thecompletebookworm- glad I could make your day, sorry if you've been having a tough time lately. Anyway, you're my special reviewer! (DUN DUN DUNN) YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE WHO HASN'T CRITIQUED ON MY SPELLING! WAHOOOO!**

**To those who do look at my spelling (yep, I'm looking at you, hpfan224) sor-ry. If you read my profile you will see that I am aware of it and I'm sorry! I don't have a beta and I did give you warning. You know, it's gotten a lot better at it.**

**Anyway, enjoy!**

Despite the possibility of missing breakfast, the marauders all slept in the next day. When Remus happened to wake up first, to everyone's surprise, he quickly got everyone moving. They were good at finding their way to the great hall because no matter where the stairs moved, they gust had to get to ground level, but the trick was finding your way around the levels. Since the marauders were late, there was no older student to follow like they usually did, so when they made it to the great hall only two minutes were left.

"No!" Madelyn cried after scanning the table. There were no cinnamon rolls left.

The other marauders faces were a mix of pity and laughter as they looked at their friend. Madelyn glared at them before getting some eggs.

"That's all you're eating?" Sirius asked in disbelief while the others scavenged for as much food as they could get.

Madelyn was calmly eating watching them, "when it comes to cinnamon rolls I can eat twenty, but otherwise I'm good."

Sirius shook his head. Madelyn was weird.

The marauders were late to Herbology. After saying a hurried apology, they quickly went to see what had happened to the plants. They didn't notice lily evens giving them a hard stare.

Professor sprout was talking, "so, your Peprit Peps, or Powder Pixies, should have reached maturity, you simply will be repotting them into larger pots so they can reach maximum size. Make sure you wear your gloves, as I said Monday, you don't want to get their powder on your skin."

The marauders grinned at each other as they all pulled small glass jars from their pockets. They each repotted around twenty of the powdered pixies, so their jars were secretly filled more than three-fourths with the powder. Madelyn thought it looked like Texas dirt.

As they left the green house, James was talking, "Remus, we shall forever worship you for finding time to look in the library for all of the spells we need."

"Yah, Remus!" laughed Madelyn.

Sirius was laughing too, "Yes, all hail his great amazingness!"

Remus gave them a little shove, "shut up."

"Hey!" Sirius tackled Remus and they rolled around fighting in the dirt. No one cared when people passed giving them funny looks. Lily evens was passing by with a scornful look as Madelyn gestured to James, "after you?" James smiled at Madelyn before they both launched onto their friends in a dog pile.

Lily evens marched off with disdain.

By the time the marauders had untangled all of their limbs and stopped laughing and made their way to the potions room they were covered with dirt and looked very scruffy. James' hair was even messier which his friends all thought impossible. Slughorn took one look at them before turning away to start his lesson.

And so the marauders day went rather smoothly all things considered. After dinner they followed a Slytherin the common room to check on the password. It was the same. They then took a nap before astronomy.

XxXxXxXxX

"Oh, man," Sirius said, "we are so lost."

"What? Nonsense! Lost is just another word for adventure!"

He gave Madelyn a quizzical look, "you know Madelyn, I'm starting to worry about your sanity."

"Aw, thanks Sirius, I didn't know you cared."

Remus was looking a bit panicked, "guys, we are lost, and it is not a good idea to miss your first class! The teachers could hate you forever and-"

"Remus, oh, Merlin!" James exclaimed. "Geez relax! The professors will love us. Although you're right we are lost. Where is astronomy anyway?"

"In the highest room, in the tallest tower," Madelyn quoted.

Sirius looked at her, "how did you know that?"

"I…wait what?"

"Wait you didn't mean to do that?"

"No," she answered James, "I'm muggleborn, so I know nothing about this place. And stop straining at me like that, Sirius."

Remus looked around, "well, let's try those stairs, since we have to go up."

They got half-way through before Remus stopped, saying it was the wrong tower.

"How do you know that?" James asked.

"The stars. But where-"

Madelyn broke him off with a funny voice, "aw, man, I am so freaking lost. Where the hell is the class?"

"That is the worst imitation of me I have ever heard."

"And how many have you heard?"

Remus cracked a smile, "including that one? One."

"Gotcha."

"So what do we do now?" Sirius asked.

"Hmm," James went, "I dunno… let's ask him." He pointed to a portrait of a knight and a fat pony. Both were asleep, snoring.

"How? They're both asleep."

"We could knock," Madelyn suggested.

James went up and knocked, "hey, wake up, lazy knight, guy… and the horse."

The knight blearily opened his eyes half-way, and they flew open wide when he saw the skinny boy looking at him.

"ARRGH! Who dares awaken sir Cadogan from his slumber! Stay firm and fight you scurvy coward!" he shouted, trying to get up of the ground, but eventually fell back down heavily. Even his pony looked at him with disdain.

James tried again, "hey, um… hi. So… he need your help, and-"

"You mangy dog, why don't you," he froze having caught sight of Madelyn. "Well, apologies, m'lady. What can I do for you, and your caravan of knights?"

"Oh," she said, glancing at James and Remus, "um… we, ah, we need to get to the astronomy tower?"

"Of course, onward!" he cried trying to mount the pony. It took a few steps and he fell off. "Never mind, on foot!" racing off.

"Why do I get the feeling he falls off a lot?" James asked Remus before they both raced off after him.

"Are you a seer?" Sirius asked, still looking at her funny.

"What?" Madelyn asked over her shoulder as she raced off.

"Huh?" Sirius looked as though he had been snapped out of something. "Wait, where did everyone go?" he asked before running off after the echoing footsteps.

He led them down several stairs, across hallways and floors, and then up several stairs, until they reached a portrait of what looked like several opera women.

Cadogan stopped there, "I'm afraid you will have to venture forth into the belly of the beast to finish our great and noble quest. I cannot proceed since there are no more paintings I can go forth in. farewell my faithful, brave comrades." And with that he raced back to his portrait, or at least, how much he could race, since he was very out of shape.

All of the marauders stood there looking at each other, "he's mental, absolutely insane."

"I like him," Madelyn said looking thoughtful.

Sirius shook his head, "defiantly worried about your sanity."

"What was that about?" James asked.

Remus answered in what was a teacher voice, "my guess is that since he's a knight, he's been taught to behave and be polite to the females of our species. Therefore, when he saw Madelyn, he became chivalrous."

James had his head tilted back, eyes shut, and a light snore was escaping from his open mouth. When Remus stopped talking, he snapped up, aware. "Huh? Wha-"

Madelyn was looking at the opera women, "why are they still asleep?"

Sirius pointed at several dusty, but empty bottles at their feet.

"Oh."

And with that, the young marauders climbed the stairs to astronomy.

XxXxXxXxX

At the class, Remus showed that he knew quite a bit about the moon, Sirius knew all of the stars, which apparently had something to do with a tree, Madelyn knew some constellations, and James simply said the stars were pretty.

When they left, they didn't go to their common room, they went to the dungeons. It was time to get things set up.

"Let's do this."


	6. the First Prank

**DON'T KILL ME!**

XxXxXxXxX

The marauders were excited. Remus kept hissing at them to be calm; otherwise they would look suspicious, get caught, and the plan would be ruined. They had prepared everything the night before, and had gotten into the Slytherin common room to plant the dust on all of the clothing. They were ready for dinner.

Remus was gnawing on his steak bone. It was his favorite thing to eat; a nice, juicy steak with sauce, and the best part was the bone. It was the only thing that he got messy while eating, but by the end of the meal, he would have licked it all off his fingers and face.

` Rare steak… the more rare the better, especially when he got closer to the full moon… no. he wouldn't think of that. No one had wondered about anything yet, and he would enjoy it while it lasted. Enjoy the _friendship_ while it lasted.

"Hey," Madelyn was holding her goblet and looking at it funny, "by the way, what the hell am I drinking?"

"You know," Remus sucked sauce off of thumb before giving Madelyn a cross look, "your 'American language' as you call it, is truly atrocious. You should honestly stop swearing like the drunken sailor you are."

"Atrising? Vlemging?" James was grinning at Remus. "What, my good man Sirius, do you suppose these alien words are that this small stranger speaks so vehemently?"

Sirius' grin was matching. "Ah, my dear James," he said wisely, "I do not know, for it is not a language I am familiar with, let alone fluent. So, alas! I cannot tell you, the answer eludes me!"

Remus' mouth opened with annoyance to argue with them, but thought better of it and turned to Madelyn, "Well, my good New Yorker, what you are drinking is pumpkin juice."

Madelyn sprayed said juice out of her mouth on someone diagonal from her…that looked vaguely familiar. "What? Oh, sorry," she passed a napkin to the blond boy before turning back. "Pumpkin juice?"

"Well what did you think it was?" Confused, James's eyebrows furrowed with confusion.

"Well," Madelyn began. "I thought it was some raspberry, kiwi… zucchini with some cinnamon tea that was room temperature."

The boys stared at her with worried looks.

"But pumpkin juice sounds much grosser!" she finished. Remus couldn't but help admire her accent. He found it very interesting. Why had she come across an ocean to Hogwarts anyway?

"What do you usually drink?" Sirius inquired.

"Oh, you know, apple juice, grape juice, milk, water, ah… soy sauce, ketchup… you know, the usual."

Sirius shook his head, "No, we don't know."

"Hey, look!" Remus nudged Madelyn to get everyone's attention. "Everyone's in the hall."

James' grin reappeared, "You ready?"

Remus licked his fingers one last time. "Let's go."

The Slytherins exploded.

Interesting, Remus couldn't help but muse. When they had been planning, James and Sirius had been particularly keen to this part. Well, it did have the desired effect.

Not only did the girls start screaming for the most part, but so did many of the boys. At a very high pitch. Particularly the Ravenclaw prefect. This. Bugged. Remus. And hurt his head. Remus couldn't believe people complained about "migraines" and their "real pain." Pfft! Try being a-

No! He mentally shook himself. You're not going to think about that, you're going to have fun.

Remus focused on the task at hand. The huge cloud of red dust was beginning to settle, revealing the Slytherins, who looked highly embarrassed and unusually tattered.

Remus smiled ruefully. _Their robes look worse than mine! You had to love that._

When nothing else appeared to happen, Sirius looked at Remus, worried.

Remus smiled. "Wait for it."

On cue, fireworks exploded and fizzed all over the room. Each time they touched food or drink, they would cause that to explode. There appeared to be a small incident at the Hufflepuff's table where some girl's robes caught fire, but an exploding goblet of water took care of that.

Just because they had caused this, did not mean the marauders were spared. Remus' favorite was the casserole in James's ear. He grinned, and _was_ going to tease James mercilessly, but Madelyn cut him off with a "Don't ask." She was trying very hard not to erupt into peals of laughter. "Later."

The chatter that had been held at bay for the first part of the performance began to fill the hall, only to stop abruptly when fireworks erupted from behind the teachers, each one hitting a teacher and five students. Not only was there laughter, but also screams as people watched their classmates get whapped.

A great eruption came from beneath Flitwick, who was lifted up off the ground out of his chair by a huge red funnel. The poor man was bobbing around, gaining height until it flung Flitwick out of his seat- directly onto professor McGonagall's lap.

_We need to get a camera. A picture for every prank at _least_; because this? This is priceless._

Flitwick's arms were around McGonagall's neck and she held him while they stared at each other in shock. A pink shower of sparks rained around the two professors as they stared at each other for a good twenty seconds.

During those twenty seconds, the hall erupted into laughter.

As the last spark sizzled down McGonagall's face she turned to look at the students. She quickly swung professor Flitwick to his feet before standing herself.

Remus nearly ran off with a figurative tail between his legs when he saw professor McGonagall's face. Maybe it was how flint-like her eyes were. Or, perhaps, how thin her lips were, or how wide her nostrils had flared. But what had probably set off Remus' self-preservation was how she was mad.

Remus didn't like swearing, but he figured he would take a leaf out of Madelyn's book.

McGonagall looked pissed.

The other marauders had noticed. James cringed back and was looking for some cave he could hide in, and Sirius' entire body had tensed, like he was going to spring up, kick someone, and run out the doors. Madelyn looked completely relaxed though.

"Who did this?"

James began to whisper frantically, "Mates, what do I do? The next part-"

Remus pulled out some parchment and a quill, "Hey, relax, you just write it on this."

"Remember," Sirius murmured, "keep it short and sweet."

James bent his head and scrawled a word. Sure enough, it appeared in flaming red letters above the hall.

_US._

Everyone started whispering, but you could still hear McGonagall's voice ring, "Who are you?"

But "us" said no more.

**XxXxXxXxX**

**Just wanted to say, not my fault.**

_What? Of course it was your fault!_

Yeah you can't blame us, we're just the people in your head.

_And since we aren't real, the blame falls to you._

**Ok, um… excuses… um… pranks are hard to plan?**

No, you planned this over a month ago.

**Ok… uh, I broke my collar bone?**

_No, that would be a reason to get more done._

**Well... there is the other reason…**

_**And what's that?**_

_Ah! Icey! You're here!_

Well, we um, our flash drive has gone missing

**LLEEEEEERRROOOOOOOYYYY! COME BACK TOOO MEEEEE!**

_It's been a very painful loss._

_**You lost your flash drive?**_

We did not lose him! We simply don't know where he is.

**WHHAAAAAA! PLEASE! WE MADE YOU MUFFINS!**

_What the hell is wrong with you?_

_We've been looking everywhere. Perhaps… perhaps he has gone to join mother Russia._

NO! Leroy was loyal! He would never do that!

_Seriously? What the fuck is wrong with your head?_

_Oh, shut up, you. You aren't even supposed to be here!_

Oh, I invited her.

_What?_

It's just for the intro. Hey everybody, I'd like you to meet our new beta, ice- oh wait I'm not supposed to tell you that! Boo-ya.

_West, you're insane._

**Probably, but at least now there won't be anyone complaining about me putting pine instead of nine!**

***x***

**SHOUT-OUT: thecompleatbookworm- I will read your story! Eventually. I started to but complications arose and, well… then I started reading Hetalia. Whoops!**

_**Good evening, good morning, good afternoon, folks! Welcome to this chapter of Once a Marauder, Always a Marauder. I am not going to tell you who I am, since I don't want you stalking my profile (besides, I doubt any of you would like what I write anyway). Okay? Okay. Good. **_

_**You can all address me as Icey. I am West's new beta, and a personal friend, so any spelling and grammar mistakes will be directed at moi. I'll also be giving West some ideas with the story. If I forget anything, mention it, okay? I don't like making mistakes with other people's stories. **_


	7. I have a game!

"What should we do now?" Sirius asked again.

"I don't know, what do you want to do?"

Sirius paused, eyebrows scrunched in thought, "Uuuhhhhhhhh…"

James grinned widely before remembering he was supposed to be crabby. He scowled and hugged his pillow even tighter, pouting.

"Ooh! Oh! I know, I know!" Sirius bounced up and down on his bed.

"What?"

"Oh, oh, oh, we can just play twenty questions thingy! We go around asking questions as personal or as embarrassing as we like and everyone has to answer! It'll be like getting ammunition for blackmail!" Sirius let out a shrill, demonic cackled.

James scowled, "No." Though he was tempted. A little.

"Oh, don't be such a bloody spoilsport," Sirius rolled of his bed and bounded over to Remus's. "Hey, Remus! Hey, hey, Remus?"

"What?" Remus grunted, not even looking up from his defense against the dark arts book.

"We're gonna play a questions game! C'mon, it'll be fun!"

"Fun? What is this strange, new thing you speak of?" Remus replied in a dry voice, his eyes never leaving the page.

"Come ooo-annn!" Sirius whined. He hopped up onto Remus' bed and began to jump up and down. "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon…"

James tuned them out. What had gone wrong? What were they missing? Why didn't it work?

"Boing, boing… bounce, bounce, bounce…"

Sirius had to wonder who would snap first.

"Oh, all right!" Remus slammed his book shut, obviously unable to take any more.

"Yay!" Sirius cheered. He crossed the room, "C'mon Madelyn, be more fun than these two! Crawl out of that den and play, pleeaasse?" Sirius gave her shiny, wide puppy eyes.

Den? Well, yes, I suppose that would make sense.

Madelyn had spent the night across the room in a kinda- corner, and the area was draped and covered with blankets and pillows.

The lion's den, the belly of the beast, the mouth of the cave… nah, den's the best.

Madelyn readily agreed, so Sirius raced over to drag James off of his bed.

"Niurg," he groaned, holding fast to his pillow, his words slurring together. "Leammeal'ne*."

"Oh, come on James," Madelyn was grinning, "you can't mope about not finding the secret passage forever."

"Yes I can," he grumbled.

They had spent the entire morning searching. They had found the tapestry on the fourth floor very easily, but not the passage. They had tried spells, Latin, gibberish, and retracing their steps. After receiving many nasty bruises on account of throwing themselves against the wall, they had, momentarily, mind you, admitted defeat.

"We can try again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next for the next seven years," Madelyn continued. "We'll find it eventually."

Mumbling to himself, James sat down as Sirius began to explain the game, which was simple enough. One person would ask the question, and the other person _had _to answer. No matter how embarrassing the answer was.

"So," Sirius began seriously, "what is…your favorite type of dessert?"

James snorted. "Are you serious?"

"Of course I'm serious!" Sirius said brightly. "I'm Sirius!"

Madelyn grinned, "Sirius is serious."

"Oh, Merlin," Remus groaned, covering his face with his hands.

"Sirius, come on, mate. That's just painful," James said, wincing.

"I am seriously Sirius! Anyway, mine's fudge!"

Madelyn narrowed her eyes at him, "what kind?"

"Milk. Rich and creamy, though I will take dark. Sometimes with almonds."

She nodded, "Good man."

Remus sighed and began to unwrap a chocolate frog, "Anything that's chocolate."

"Amen," Madelyn said solemnly.

"Mine's cake," James said, rolling his eyes. "Any type."

"Madelyn?" Sirius asked.

"Well, after mooching everything off of you guys, I'll probably go with chocolate. Just straight milk or dark. After that it would probably be candy canes."

"I don't know what those are," Sirius said. "Ok, Remus, your question."

They continued on like this for almost an hour. They never asked a serious question, so they were laughing the entire time. The way the game ended was quite interesting, or at least, to a pair of unnoticed eyes...

"Ok," said James. He was actually enjoying the game. "What is something you really like?"

"Very creative James," Remus gave a small smile.

James shrugged, "Mine's Quidditch."

"Mine is chocolate."

"Remus, for you, everything's chocolate."

"So? Chocolate is good for your soul."

"Yeah, what's wrong with chocolate?"

"I never said that there was a problem with it! It's not like I'm against it or anything-"

"There is nothing wrong with chocolate," Sirius said. "None of us are against it. Chocolate is good."

"So, what's your answer, Sirius?"

"Hand-cuffs."

"Hand-cuffs?" James raised a brow.

"Hand-cuffs."

Madelyn muttered something that sounded suspiciously like, "kinky". Sirius chose to ignore it.

There was a pause. James sounded incredulous, "Why in the bloody name of Merlin would you say-"

"Anyway," Remus interrupted, "what about you, Madelyn?"

"Huh? Oh, um… well I like to be squished," it sounded like a question.

"Squished?" Sirius repeated.

"Well, yeah. My brothers sometimes called me Squishy, because I liked to be hugged hard and they could just lay on me and be fine. Although it's been several years since I've been squished…" Madelyn trailed off.

Sirius looked at James.

James looked at Sirius.

*x*x*x*x*

"Merlin's pants! What are you doing?"

Sirius didn't even have to open his eyes to know who it was. No one else could be so annoying, or get into other people's business while they were trying to sleep. Wait a minute…

Trying to sleep. The memory of last night came rushing back. He and James had gotten a brilliant idea after Madelyn talked about squishing. They had run around the dorm and gotten the pillows from Madelyn's den and all of the beds, including the empty one. _And then we came down to the couches… oh, Merlin!_

Sirius opened his eyes and tried to sit up. Tried to, and he would have succeeded, if it weren't for the duct tape they had found in Madelyn's trunk. He settled down and shut his eyes.

"Nurghe," Sirius moaned. "Go away."

"No!" the red-head was indignant. "What are you doing?"

"Mnurrge," Sirius complained, nudging James, who was below him, with his hand.

"Go away, Millie," James whined.

"It's Lily," she snapped. "Lily Evens."

"Whatever. Just let us sleep in peace."

Madelyn shifted underneath them. "Wake-up call?"

"Nooo, I wanna sleeeep!" Sirius whined.

Madelyn groaned, "And to what do I owe the pleasure, Miss Evens?"

"Just what are you four doing?"

Madelyn made a scathing noise in the back of her throat, "Really? That's it? Hey Remus, time to get up."

He didn't even make a noise.

"Madelyn, can't we just sleep?" Sirius asked.

"We have a crowd Sirius."

"So?"

Madelyn gave a heave and rolled them all onto the floor. That did wake Remus up.

"Huh? Wha-"

James began to struggle, "Oi, how do we get out of this?"

They had been sleeping stacked up one on top of the other, with pillows in-between. Madelyn was at the bottom with Remus above her, while Sirius was at the top. To ensure that they didn't all fall of, they had strapped themselves together with duct tape.

Remus, who was still partially asleep, must have realized that he was trapped and began to freak. He strained and fought against the ropes like a mad man, and actually began to heave the four of them off the ground in his efforts.

"Whoa, hey Remus!"

"Remus, call down mate!"

"Remus, its ok!"

Madelyn's voice became smooth as she cut in, "Remus, I can get us out of this, but I need you to calm down, ok? Can you do that? It's alright I can take care of the duct tape-"

Eventually Remus stopped struggling and lay there, his breath ragged.

"Hey, ah, Madelyn?" Sirius asked. "How exactly-"

"If you'll just hold on a minute, I can reach my- aha! Go it!"

"Got what?"

Madelyn sounded distracted, "I'm American; we have pocket knives. Ah, here we go!"

With a great ripping noise, she tore the tape off of all of them, freeing the pillows. Madelyn then set to work on the strip at their feet.

"Hey, Remus, you should have told us that you were claustrophobic. If you had, we wouldn't have done this."

Once their feet were free he replied, "I didn't think I would react that bad."

"Don't you all have somewhere to be?" Madelyn cast a hard eye over some Gryffindor's who were watching. Lily Evens left as well after a stare down from the female marauder.

"I'm sorry, "Remus looked at the ground while apologizing

"What for? We all of little eccentrics and quirks. Look at me for instance. I. am. Paranoid. Yes, Americans have pocket knives, but they generally don't sleep with them in their shoes."

"But, you aren't wearing shoes."

"Slipper socks count."

"Oh."

And with that, they all left for the great hall. Madelyn didn't have shoes, and they were all in their robes from the day before.

_But, hey? It's alright._


	8. foundations

**NOT MY FAULT!**

_As much as it pains me to admit it, and it does, she's right._

Damn straight, she is! We finished this on _Valentine's Day!_

**Not. My. Fault.**

Eh, I blame Icey.

_Me, too._

**Me, three.**

Me, four.

**Four? AAAAHHH! IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN!**

Oops, my bad. I went twice.

_Why do I even come here?_

Because we have rolling-chairs.

XxXxXxX

"Ok," James began, "how about this-"

"No," Remus cut in tonelessly. "And before you ask, no."

He slammed his head against the table. "Oh, come on!"

"James. Stop. Change your thinking! We already agreed that the first pranks would be for the entire school."

"I offered some ideas, but you shot them down!"

Remus threw his hands in the air, "James, we can't perform fifth year's magic! Our first prank was just third year, and that was hard enough! I'm surprised we even managed it."

"Because we're amazing." Madelyn stated as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Ok, ok," James grumbled.

Sirius suppressed a yawn. It was almost a week since their prank, and coming up with one was harder than they had though it would be. They were eating breakfast, and James was still trying to think of something. Just as he had been for the past two days.

"James, mate," Sirius said through another yawn, "They're great ideas, but we need something that we can use _now_."

"What we need," Madelyn thought out loud, "Is inspiration. Just like how we planned the last prank on your firework in potions."

Remus rubbed his face tiredly, "And an alternative to magic. I don't want to have to go combing through the library every time we want to try something."

Sirius shrugged, "So, let's get a potion!"

"Yeah, but how?" Remus spoke, voice muffled by his hand . "Even if we could brew some efficiently, we don't have the necessary materials or ingredients to do so."

Sirius rolled his eyes, "We have potions today. I bet Slughorn has some in his office. And he has a cupboard filled with different brews in the dungeons. We cause a distraction, two of us slip in and grab some, continue on as though nothing happened."

"It's probably locked."

"So pick the lock," Madelyn said simply, shrugging her shoulders.

"Can you do that?"

Madelyn rolled her eyes, "Dude, I'm the girl that sleeps with a pocket knife." Cue wide eyes. Feeling slightly self-conscious, Madelyn snapped, "Of course I can pick a lock! What kind of question is that?"

James rolled his eyes in turn, "Ok, now that that's taken care of, who's going to do the distraction, and who's going to help Madelyn?"

"Five more minutes!"Slughorn trilled. The class simultaneously stirred at their potions.

James quietly cleared his throat and gave Sirius a nudge. A firework slipped out of James' sleeve and into his hand.

"Which one?" he whispered.

Sirius ran an eye over the room. "Behind meter diagonal from you."

James began to cough. He brought both hands up to cover his mouth and casually threw the firework over his shoulder. Madelyn started to creep to the edge of her table.

The potion behind them gave an ominous rumble and rose up over the rim in hissing bubbles. Its brewer let out a shriek as it flowed over the edge of her table towards Sirius and James.

"Ahh!" James yelled.

"Run!" Sirius shouted, flipping over their table. As the potions flowed together with the first one, James saw Madelyn reach the door and cover it with her hands.

The table that Sirius had flipped hit the two students sitting in front of them.

"Aii!" one girl screeched as they in turn hit their own table and caused it to turn over. It all reminded James of that one muggle thingy… um, oh, dominoes!

As students started to scream, James saw Madelyn carefullyopen the door and Remus slip inside.

James looked over at Sirius and grinned.

"Aaaahhhhh!" Sirius screamed, throwing his hands in the air and running around. "We're all going to die!"

James unsuccessfully tried not to grin as girls started to scream even more.

"Help!"

"Merlin!"

"Ok, everyone," Slughorn shouted, "Let's just all calm down, and- oh, my!"

The poor professor had to duck in order to dodge a chair that had gone flying across the room.

XxXxXxXxX

"Ok, we're in."

Remus ducked past Madelyn to come face to face with rows upon rows of vials.

"I don't even recognize half of these!" he hissed.

Madelyn grinned, "I don't recognize any."

They went to different shelves and began to comb through them.

"Ok…" Remus mumbled to himself. "Sleeping… pain-killing… growing… shrinking…purple, green… I don't even know what color this is."

"Which ones should we take?" Madelyn asked.

"I don't know what we'll need, so just take a variety- and quick!"

They hurriedly began to take random vials and shove them into their jeans and robes. Remus could already feel the hours of reading it would take to identify them all.

"Madelyn, do you see those pink ones above you?" She paused and looked to where he was pointing."Those are pepper-up potions. Take a few extra."

He headed toward the door, slipping the last potion that wouldn't fit into any of his pockets into his sock.

Madelyn appeared behind him, "Hey, do you have any extra room? I don't know where to put these three."

"No, just put them in your shoes, like I did."

She shook her head, "My socks are full."

"Well… I d'unno, but we got to go!" Remus put his hand on the doorknob.

"But… ah… mmm," Madelyn's eyes darted back and forth before she dropped the vials down the front of her shirt.

Remus raised his eyebrows at her.

"What? This is Europe, no one's going to look there!" she hissed. "Wait a minute… they won't, right?"

"I don't think- I mean, I hope not- I, you know, let's just go!"

And with that, he opened the door and they walked out.

"Ok, children, now that we are all patched up from the little, ah, incident, we are unfortunately out of time, so I must ask that you write an essay about this particular potion that is fourteen inches long…" The hassled Professor began a no doubt long and rambling speech about their homework. None of the marauders, however, were listening.

Sirius looked up and saw Madelyn and Remus standing at their desk, pockets bulging. He gave James a grin.

As the marauders walked out together, Sirius turned to the group with a wolfish grin, "So, how did it go?"

"I'd say it went very well."

"Hey, mate, are you ok?" James asked.

Remus was limping, and he had a funny look on his face, "Yeah, it's just… I had no room in my pockets, so I put a vial in my sock and it slipped down into my shoe," he made a face. "Look, I don't like stealing like this."

James looked at the floor, "I'm not too fond of it either. But, how about we pay Slughorn back! Eventually."

Remus nodded.

"Um, do you want us to take some of the potions?" Sirius asked.

"Oh, yeah," Madelyn said. "Hey, James, you're fast, right?"

"Er, yeah?"

"Can you run up to the dorm and grab two pillow cases? Not the pillow, just the case."

"Uh…sure!"

As he ran off, Sirius asked, "Why two?"

She gave him an innocent look. "Oh, no reason."

After Remus fished the potion out of his sock, he gave it to Sirius and they made it to Defense against the Dark Arts. They had just seated themselves at a table when James appeared at the door, looking windblown.

"Wow, that was fast! I'm impressed!" Madelyn said as he handed her the requested baggy white things.

"No problem!" James hadn't quit smiling from when she had sent him on the errand.

They all quickly dumped the potions into one of the cases, put it inside the other, and placed it at James' feet just in time for their teacher to walk in. Professor Mandan was short, had a hard face, and brown hair. There seemed to be something off about him, but Sirius wasn't sure what.

"Good morning class, today we will be learning about a handy little spell that produces blue, water-proof flames. Now, the pages in your books you should turn to are page ninety-five and six…"

He continued on, demonstrating and teaching in a low drone while the class followed from their books and watched. Eventually he let everyone begin to practice.

"So, any idea what the potions are?" Sirius asked while James tried to set the cloth between them on fire.

"I didn't know them, but Remus recognized a few. I plan to go to the library for lunch to see what I can find," Madelyn fell silent as the professor came over to their table to check on them.

"Not bad for a first time," he said to James, who managed to produce a spark that winked out.

"Hey, good job, Remus!" Sirius said when the boy managed to produce a complete tongue of flame that quickly consumed the entire piece of fabric.

"Hmm, yes…" Professor Mandan said in a tight, disdainful voice. He looked down his nose at Remus, flared his nostrils, and walked away.

"Well, that was rude," Sirius said, watching him. "What's his problem?"

"Don't worry about it," Remus muttered.

They continued to work until the class was dismissed. When they entered the hall, James bounded forward, smiling, eager for food.

"So, what do we do now?"

"I'm going to the library," Madelyn said, shoveling down food. "I want to grab the books we'll need and look for some others. Try not to choke on anything while I'm gone."

"Bye, have fun!"

"Don't let yourself be crushed by the books!"

"And don't read too much!"

"Or let yourself catch library-itis!"

Madelyn rolled her eyes, smiling, "Look both ways before crossing the street, don't talk to strangers, come to a complete stop at stop signs, don't talk back to cops, I get it. You three behave."

"Bye!"

"Goodbye!"

"Adieu!"

As soon as she was out of the hall, the three remaining marauders turned to each other, smiling.

"She babies us too much."

"I know, it's like having another mum."

"That's not exactly a bad thing," Remus said in a small voice. "I mean, she did teach James how to tie his shoelaces."

Sirius took a swig of pumpkin juice, nodding, "She showed me where the toothpaste was."

"And she reminds us we have homework, what it is, and when it's due," James smiled. "Thank Merlin; otherwise McGonagall would hate me by now."

Sirius laughed, "Yeah, but now McGonagall thinks you're an angel. Madelyn is a mum."

"What do they call them in America? Mama?"

"Big Mama!"

"Big Mama! Madelyn's Big Mama!" James was bent over laughing along with Sirius. Even Remus gave a small chuckle.

"Hmm, potions, potions…" Madelyn mused as she trailed down the shelves. An encyclopedia caught her eye. Potions: Cause and Effect, Identifying, Shortcuts and More! With Pictures!

"Love how they mention the pictures…" she muttered.

Madelyn began to go through the pages, musing to herself. She was completely oblivious to the world.

"What are you doing?"

"WHAK!" Madelyn jumped, nearly falling over, "Whoa," she caught herself and straightened.

"Who are you?"

The ghost who appeared behind her looked Madelyn up and down, "Judging by your appearance and the book you're holding, I would say around fourth or fifth year. But you don't know me, so you must be a first year."

"Huh," Madelyn shut her book and leaned against the shelf. "You're good."

"And you're not," the ghost said in a nasty voice. "What are you doing with a book like that? Adding that to your cocky attitude judged by how you lean against the shelf, you're up to no good. Although that could just be because you're American,and this alone is enough to raise suspicion against you. So is that pillow case next to your feet."

Madelyn smirked and raised her hands, "Do you hear me denying it?"

The ghost, which just seconds before had been shaking agitatedly, finally settled, floating in the air, "No I don't," she said crabbily.

Madelyn pointed at her, her fingers forming a gun, "I didn't catch your name."

"That's because I didn't give it."

"Huh," she gave a small laugh, "So, I was looking at a book and being suspicious. What are you going to do now?"

"Nothing. I don't like the people in this school, and it's not like they would believe me anyway," still in her sitting position, the ghost floated away through the shelf.

"Huh," Madelyn went. She grabbed a few more books, put them all in the pillow case and walked out of the row. As she turned the corner, she ran right into someone, knocking them both down.

"Whoa!"

"Oh, ow."

Madelyn rolled to her knees and began to grab the potions and put them back in the case before the man would see them.

"Oh, here," he handed her one of the books.

"Thanks."

"Are you a student?"

"Yeah," she looked up at him. He wore no house colors, "You a teacher?"

"Yes," he extended a hand, "Professor X, muggle studies."

She shook it, "X… that doesn't happen to stand for Xavier, does it?"

He smiled, "It does, actually!" he said brightly. "How did you know?"

Madelyn shrugged. "Oh… no reason."

Professor X nodded to the potion aisle, "What were you looking for?"

"Oh, I just wanted to know more about potions. I find them fascinating, and I'm a muggle-born, and want to know more about everything, so…" she shrugged again, "Hey, do you know where the history books are? If wizards have been secretly living in our world for forever, they must've had some effect on the past that the muggles wouldn't know about.

"Ah!" Professor X's eyes were gleaming with excitement. "I know just what you want. It's over here."

He led her down several rows, across a few shelves, and pulled out a large tome and three leather bound not-quite-book-lets. "Here, a bit large, granted, but well worth the time it takes to read."

"Thanks," Madelyn put them with the potion books in the pillow case. The smaller case that held all of the potions rested on top of the stacks of books inside the larger pillow case. Madelyn was impressed that the cotton was able to hold all of the weight.

"Oh, and since you are American you will enjoy this one. And," he went over to the wall and pulled out an old scroll, "This, you will find helpful."

"Thanks," Madelyn was holding the bulging pillowcase to her chest with both arms, "This really saves me a lot of time."

"Oh, think nothing of it. If you hurry, you can still make it to the end of lunch!" Professor X walked off, humming merrily.

Madelyn walked off too, but, once again, she was interrupted by the ghost from earlier.

"You're a trouble maker aren't you?"

"What does it matter?"

"Well, trouble makers make everything much more interesting, and entertaining to watch, so I might just help said person if this was indeed their intentions…"

Madelyn slowly turned to look at the nameless ghost, "What do you have in mind?"

"Hey, mates, guys, we go to transfiguration next, right?"

"Right," Sirius said slowly.

"Ok, then, we're gonna have to hurry."

The marauders were sitting in their rows in transfiguration. Remus couldn't help but find this plan of Sirius's ridiculous. But then, the fact that James had been carrying around packets of ketchup was even more ridiculous. But why did he have to do it? He would feel so foolish.

But a little voice in the back of his head was thinking, _This is going to be so much fun._

Remus leaned back so that the others could hear him, "You ready?"

"Waiting for you."

Remus pulled the packet of ketchup out of his pocket, tore it open, and in one swift movement, shot it at his face.

Right at his nose.

"Ah!" Remus cried, smacking a hand to his face. "Oh, Merlin, I'm bleeding!"

The red-head that James called Millie turned around from her seat in the front and shrieked at the sight of Remus' face.

McGonagall hurried over, "What happened?"

"Oooogh," Remus bent over as if in pain, secretly emptying another packet of ketchup into his hand to smear over the bottom half of his face. He held his red-stained hands up to see, "Ah! Oh, Merlin, my nose is bleeding!"

No one noticed that James and Sirius were missing.

"Oh, boy, it's a gusher!" Madelyn shouted from behind Remus.

"Yep, that's what it is," Remus agreed, trying to nod and wipe the "blood" off his face at the same time. "It's a gush- WHO CARES WHAT TYPE IT IS?" he whipped around to yell at Madelyn and unload another packet.

One of the hufflepuffs started crying as McGonagall tried to calm everybody down and stop the heavy "bleeding" all at once.

"Now, really, Jones, stop crying. Mr. Lupin, go down to the hospital wing to get cleaned up. Miss West, go with him."

As the two troublemakers walked out, James Potter and Sirius Black seemed to magically reappear. Remus turned his head to look at the two grinning fools.

James and Sirius simultaneously shot the "bloody" boy a thumbs-up.

Madelyn and Remus sat waiting in the dorm, eating the ketchup off of Remus' face with pieces of chicken the managed to get from the great hall when they were supposed to be at the hospital wing. James and Sirius walked in.

"It is done!" Sirius announced with a flourish and a bow.

Madelyn started clapping as the dark-haired boy produces five pieces of parchment from his sleeve.

"Thank you, thank you," Sirius said as he and James sat on the floor next to their two friends.

"All five pieces?" Remus asked around a bite of chicken.

"Yep!" James answered. "You say you learned this from a ghost?"

Madelyn explained her encounter with the 'Nameless Female Dead Person,' (As Sirius called her). "I'll probably go back to figure out her name in a day or so," she commented from behind one of the books Professor X had given her.

"How did you know his name was Xavier?" Sirius asked.

"He's a hero."

"What? But you just met his today! How is he already your hero?"

Remus could practically feel that eye-roll.

"Hey did you know that George Washington was what you call a squib? And that that is why he hated that he never managed to catch Benedict Arnold, who was a wizard? He wanted to prove that he was just as good as a wizard. Native American tribes were full of magical people. Or how about that a witch blew up the Maine and started the Spanish-American war? There's tons more and that's just American history! Wizards have been meddling around a lot more than they realize!"

"Hm, right. Anyway!" Sirius began. "Let's get started on figuring out what potions these are."

He pulled the pillow case out from under the spare bed in the room and began to sort through them. He passed some out and the three boys began to flip through the books that Madelyn had gotten from the library. James and Sirius had a brief but fierce battle over who got the one with the pictures.

"Hey," Remus began looking at the inside cover, "When are these due back at the library, Madelyn? Because there aren't any due dates…did you not even check them out?"

"Hmm, what did you say Remus?" Madelyn said, studying the scroll.

He breathed a heavy sigh, "Never mind."

"Yeah… well, as fun as this is," Madelyn said, standing up, "I'm gonna get going."

"Huh?"

"Wha-"

"Wait, you're leaving?"

"Where are you going?"

Madelyn smiled and began to pack up her things, "I don't live here, guys. This isn't my dorm, and I figure I should go back to the one that is. I kinda have to live with the other inhabitants for the next seven years, so I figure that I ought to go learn their names."

James gave her a blank look. "You don't even know their names?" He was ignored staunchly by the others.

Remus smiled, "See if you last the night."

Sirius got up, wearing an abandoned puppy face.

"Bye, Big Mama," he gave her a hug. "I hope you don't die."

"Drama queen," James muttered.

"Big Mama?" Madelyn asked.

Sirius let go, "Oh, ha-ha," he said nervously. "We kind of gave you a nick-name."

"It was James' idea," Remus piped up.

James's face became mortified. "What? Traitor!"

"Oh, yeah?" Madelyn asked. "And what's he, Twerp?"

Sirius gave an impish smile, "Skinny Little Git."

"Hey!"

"What? I thought we decided on arrogant Little Pip-Squeak." Remus frowned mockingly.

"Hey!"

"Ha ha! Well, I'm still going."

Sirius sighed and closed his book, "Well, we'll save the work for when you get back."

Madelyn rolled her eyes, "Just clean everything up, in case someone comes in here. Bye!"

She walked over and opened the door. As she walked through, Remus heard her give an enthusiastic, "Hi!"

Who was she saying hi to?

The three marauders were in the great hall, eating breakfast, when suddenly Madelyn appeared next to them.

"Oh, hey, Madelyn, where did you go?"

"What, I was-"

"Oh, Merlin, this is delicious," Sirius moaned.

"See? I told you!" James said triumphantly.

They had made breakfast sandwiches out of toast, scrambled eggs, and ketchup.

"Madelyn, Remus, you have to try this!"

"Are you kidding me?" she asked. "What's good is tortilla bread, eggs, and salsa. It's amazing!"

Madelyn joined them at the table and began to eat.

"Hey."

Madelyn looked up, "Oh, hey Maja! I didn't even notice you. How are you?"

Before the girl across from Madelyn could reply, Sirius turned around and asked with his mouth full, "Who are you?"

"Huh? Oh!" Madelyn looked between them, "Maja, this is Sirius, Sirius, other people, this is Maja."

Remus turned to look at the new-comer, "Hello."

Maja looked a little overwhelmed by all of the sets of eyes, "Hi, um, I'm Maja Patel; I'm in Madelyn's dorm."

"You're a first year? In our class?" James sounded shocked.

Sirius laughed, "James there are other people in Gryffindor."

"Yeah," Maja gave a light smile. "I have an older sister in ravenclaw."

James nodded and looked at Madelyn, "Wait, you know who's in your dorm?"

"Yes, there's Maja, a girl called Alice, a girl named Mary… oh, get this, James! There's that red-head chick that always yells at us, and it turns out, her name isn't Millie at all! It's _Lily!_"

"_No!"_

"Oh, _yeah!"_ Madelyn nodded, "Did any of you see that one coming?"

"No."

"Not at all."

"I don't believe it."

A loud screech from above caught everyone's attention.

"Mail!"

"Mail?"

A large great horned owl came towards James, dropping its parcel in his lap. It gave a soft hoot, nuzzled James' ear, and flew off. To the marauder's surprise, a dark school owl flew over to Madelyn and dropped a letter on her head.

James tore open the package and gave a smile to Remus and Sirius, "Mates, we now have a camera!"

"Perfect!" Sirius took it and began to fiddle with some knobs on it. "We can start documenting our pranks! Madelyn, what did you get?"

Madelyn was smiling as her eyes reached the end of the page, "A letter from home. My mom wants to know why I got detention, how things are, do I like it here, have I made friends…"

"Hold on, your mum only just learned you had detention?"

"She must have been cooking when she wrote the letter because one of the pages from our recipe book is in here," she ran an eye over the brown paper. "I mean, she knows that I don't like Jell-O. At least, I think she knows."

She looked up at the boys, who were staring at her, mouths open.

"What?"

Then it hit her.

"Oooh!"

_Jell-O._


	9. The Second Prank

*throws up hands in defense* DON'T SPEAR MEEEEE! And in my defense, fanfiction was blocked from my house. Also, I hit a writer's block. And then I started to create a new story with some other authors.

"_It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood; it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood…"_

Madelyn was skipping down the hall, singing as she finished pulling on her shoes, "Come on, you guys. You don't want to miss breakfast, do you?"

"You are such a bloody wanker, Madelyn," Sirius grumbled, stomping past her. They weren't going to miss this breakfast, it was too important. "What are you doing, anyway?"

Madelyn looked up from her hands at her waist, "Um, tying a belt?"

That was true; a dark brown strip of faux deer skin with a dream catcher on it was fastened around her waist.

"It looks weird. Why are there feathers at the end of it?"

"Sirius," Madelyn began, sliding on bracelets and rings, "This is the 70's, and I'm a hippie; this is what we do. _'Cus this is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius!"_

Sirius let out a groan as she starting skipping down the hall again, spirits up and totally perky.

_"Age of Aquarius!"_

How? How could she have so much energy? Even the prospect of having a prank prepared could only give Sirius so much drive. The Marauders had lost so much sleep the night before preparing the prank, Sirius had only gotten three hours of shut-eye until he had his traditional bucket of water thrown on him to get him up. And here was Madelyn, jumping around like she had had a strong cup of tea and a shot of gin to get her going.

Although, now that Sirius thought about it, Madelyn was an American. She probably had never even had a cup of tea in her life.

_Figures._ Sirius gave a snort._ Yankees._

Sirius turned around and saw James, who had Remus's arm around his shoulder and was dragging the poor sleeping boy along. It was a dangerous situation, because James himself was half asleep and was stifling a yawn.

The marauders reached the Great Hall to find a large crowd of students gathered around the closed doors.

"What's going on?"

"Are we locked out?"

"Is someone locked in?"

"Do you think it's 'US'?"

_POOFSH!_

The doors to the great hall had given a great jerk against their hinges, but they did not fall over, neither they did not open.

Some of the students that had fallen over at the sudden loud noise stood up and whispers began anew.

"What was that?"

"What happened?"

"Are we going to die?"

_CrrrEEEEEeekk…_

All of the whispers stopped…

…as the door slowly cracked open.

"What the bloody…"

The boy walked inside the Great Hall in a stupor of awe. This was incredible. Almost everything was white.

Ice cream rose from the floor in mounds as whipped cream fell from the ceiling. The tables were so colorful; candies from all over the world were strewn across their surface.

But the very best part was the giant block of green in the center of the room.

Jell-O. A giant box of green Jell-O was in the middle of the great hall, and encased in it was the teachers.

The students all gathered around the spectacle. Each teacher was positioned like they were sitting in their usual chairs.

Even frozen in place, McGonagall managed to glare at all of the students before looking at Professor Dumbledore. He was smiling merrily.

The old professor calmly began to move his hand across his body, to reach into his pocket…

And pull out a straw.

Eyes twinkling, Dumbledore brought it to his mouth and began to suck in the Jell-O.

"FOOD!"

Like a spell had been broken, the students immediately began to scramble for the sugary treats. The boy took large handfuls of salt-water taffy and spelled his name out, P-E-T-E-R, before digging in. Peter surveyed the students. A group of hufflepuff girls began to throw mints at each other. There was a boy with a sandy blond ponytail who was putting chocolate on a chocolate poker and dipping that in a chocolate fountain before eating it.

The Ravenclaw quiddach team dove into the ice-cream mounds, before Peter was distracted by another spectacle. A girl wearing a tie-dye headband was on a table made of sponge cake, jumping a rope of red liquorish

_"Tarzan and Jane were swingin' on a vine_

_ Sippin' from a bottle of vodka double wine_

_ Jane lost her grip and a down she fell_

_ Squared herself away as she let out a yell."_

She jumped off the table next to two dark-haired boys and began to eat her rope. "I love redvines."

Peter stopped staring at them and grabbed a handful of cake from the table, settling down to enjoy it.

"Thank you, miss," Sirius took James's camera from a blushing fourth year.

She smiled and walked off to an eager group of giggling girls.

Sirius pocketed the photo for later, and headed over to his fellow marauders, who had all joined Remus at a chocolate fountain. He sat down, and took a bite of biscuit and chocolate with a smile. James was trying to find out how much he could fit in his mouth, while Madelyn had a giant marshmallow completely covered in melted chocolate in her mouth and was struggling to chew since she couldn't stop smiling. There was a good tablespoon of chocolate running down her chin. Sirius was impressed it even fit in her face; Madelyn must have a big mouth.

A loud sucking noise made everyone freeze.

Somehow Dumbledore had managed to suck his entire way out of the Jell-O. He calmly stepped out of it and waved his wand, vanishing the Jell-O and freeing his colleges; most of which promptly fell on their bums.

McGonagall somehow managed to catch herself before hitting the ground and straightened. "_Who—"_

She didn't get to finish. An answer cut her off. Hanging in silver flames were two words.

_WE DID._

XxXxXxXxX

Sadly, everyone was removed from the great hall. They weren't allowed any more of the candy.

Everyone's first class was canceled, and sent to their dorms. The marauders trudged up the stairs slowly with the rest of the Gryffindor kids, their stomachs heavy. Once in the Gryffindor dormitory, students collapsed on sofas, tables, and if furniture was not accessible, just the plain old floor.

People began to chatter on the recent turn of events, and the marauders weren't an exception. There was just a different edge to their voices.

James was practically bouncing in his seat.

Sirius laughed, "Whoa, mate, easy on the sugar high there."

James laughed as Madelyn replied, "Why? He'll burn it off soon enough."

'_Soon enough' is true, _Remus had a superior smile. _In three, two, one…_

"What in the bloody name of Merlin?"

The sixth year boy walked up to the wall and stared intensely, as if by doing so he could find the answers. When they walked out of the fat lady's portrait, they were encaged by white walls. They were in a cube. It didn't make any sense!

The boy hesitantly pressed his hand against the wall, "No way. It's a mattress!"

"What? Oh, bugger…" the prefect began to poke the squishy material with his wand.

"What do we do?"

"Are we trapped?"

"This is not how I wanted to die!"

"Wait!" the other prefect, Marley Mcinnons held up her hand. "I have an idea! You!" She pointed to a watery- eyed first year. "C'mere!"

The poor boy walked up and promptly squeaked as the fifth-year beater picked him up and threw him at one of the white, plush walls.

Everyone watched transfixed as the round boy flew into a mattress and toppled the entire cube. Several students dived out of the way as the roof fell on top of them, while others weren't so lucky. Being true Gryffindors, they all scrambled to their feet so as to see what happened.

Marley was the first to the stair railing, "There he goes!"

Everyone followed her finger to the indicated firsty that was zooming down a slide made from the grand staircase, screaming in what he hoped was a very manly way. But, of course, it wasn't.

The head boy promptly had a light bulb moment.

"Gangway!" he cried, seizing a mattress and diving face first onto it.

Within seconds everyone was clamoring for a mattress. People were inventing stunts as on their makeshift mattress-boards, from going backwards, to standing up, or doing both at the same time! They passed the Ravenclaws, who had their own track. But all things must come to pass.

Professor McGonagall appeared out of nowhere with Filtch(as teachers always manage to do), and quickly brought the party to a close (again, as teachers always do). Students were sent to bed and the stairs returned to normal, mattresses disappeared, and the transfiguration professor swore that nothing else happened.

The Empress quickly sits back in her resplendent throne and drinks from a challis while guards stand firm, holding back enraged fans.

"Boom, Mother—"

Icey glances up at the Empress dryly. "So humble. We should just let them eat you."

"Silence!" points finger dramatically at her, "Kneel!"

The Empress hooks a cookie onto a stick and holds it by her feet. Icey lunges onto the ground for it. The grand Ruler rests her feet on Icey's back.


	10. I Want To Be Entertained

James had his transfiguration book facedown, open on his chest as he lay on his back and stared at the ceiling. He looked to his right; Sirius was on his own bed as he read his charms book. His eyes had been staring at the same spot on the page for the past five minutes. The empty bed had its blinds closed. James sighed.

He looked to his left. Remus was working on the herbology they had gotten this morning. There was a neat pile of chocolate frog wrappers next to him. James sighed again.

Tilting his head up, James looked across the room at Madelyn. She was sitting in her Den and was finishing a potions essay. She was signing her name with a flourish at the end while James was wondering if her many blankets were as soft and comfortable as they looked. Figuring the Marauders wouldn't be doing anything fun, James looked back at his ceiling and sighed.

His eyes flew open. _Wait a minute, sighs!_

James heaved a sigh. Sirius, who was looking for anything to do besides stare at paper, looked at James. Seeing how James was already looking at him, Sirius straightened expectantly.

James gave a dramatic sigh. Remus paused, and his eyes flared in annoyance before returning to work. James sighed again, and again, and again, watching Remus' patience shorten until he finally lifted his head to glare at James. James smiled and looked at Madelyn.

James gave as loud and dramatic a sigh as he could.

"Yes, James?" Madelyn asked with a patient voice.

"How'd you know it was me?"

She smiled before repeating, "Yes, James?"

"I'm bored."

"I figured as much."

"I want to be entertained."

Madelyn snorted, "No."

"What? Why not?"

Madelyn shut her book and tossed it to the side, "'I want to be entertained?' What are you, a king?"

James paused before grinning, "Yes."

Sirius sighed, "Jamsie Dear, what would you like to do?" there was an innocent, sweet expression was on his face.

"Tosser," James muttered. "Well, I dunno, any of you blokes have an idea?"

"Why no, James, that would indicate that we actually had the capability to _have_ a train of thought."

"Shut it, Remmy."

"Don't call me that."

Madelyn finally shut her book, "Well, I have got to return my books, any of you boys want to come along?"

Sirius gave her a disturbed look, "To the _Library?_"

"Oh, like you blokes have anything better to do!" Remus turned to his friends. "I'll come, Madelyn."

Sirius' head snapped around to look at James, "Hold the phone, James! This is a chance to meet the mysterious dead girl!"

It worked like a charm. Not thirty seconds later, the Marauders were on their way to the library. Madelyn was singing yet another song, and he when asked about it, all that Sirius understood was that Madelyn was fine with bugs. This made no sense, because Sirius had seen Madelyn launch text books at a wall just to kill a spider. Very determinedly too.

Sirius walked determinedly through the portrait hole, his mind on the strange ghost, when he suddenly stopped. A corner of his brain told him he had missed something.

"Did you blokes hear something?"

James shrugged, "Sounded like the wind."

A little perturbed, Sirius shrugged and walked on, directing his next question at Madelyn, "So what happened with this girl again?"

The American re-explained the encounter to her friends, "I'm still not too sure why she told me about the paper in McGonagall's office actually. Or how she knew about them for that matter. She did seem a bit angry at the world."

"I wonder how she became a ghost," Remus mused.

"Well," Madelyn said, opening the door to the library, "First things first, we need to get Sirius to stop calling her 'Nameless Female Dead Person'."

Madelyn led them to the area that she had met the ghost and began to leaf through some books as Sirius craned his head around bookshelves, searching.

He turned back to look at his friends, "I don't get it. Where did the ghost go?"

Remus looked at him and deadpanned, "Right behind you."

Sirius leapt around to find an irritable looking transparent girl sitting on the edge of the shelf. Well, she wasn't really sitting. In reality, she was floating several inches above the surface. Her eyes narrowed crabbily at the young Black heir.

Sirius took one look at her and let out a squawk, "Ack! Dead Lady! Save me, James!" he pulled his friend in front of him as a shield.

'Nameless Female Dead Person' rolled her eyes and looked squarely at Madelyn, "What the bloody hell are you doing back here? Haven't you been annoying enough?"

Madelyn rolled her eyes right back, "Depends on your definition of 'enough'. Besides, we were bored, and Sirius wanted to meet you."

The spirit looked over the marauders, "Which one's Sirius?"

Sirius pointed at James in front of him, "He is."

Eyes narrowed even more, a seemingly impossible feat, "You already called him 'James'."

Sirius gestured to Remus, "This is the bloke you're looking for."

"Cut it out, Sirius!"

"Damn it, mate, you gave me away!"

"How stupid do you think she is?"

"And here I was thinking you actually cared about me, Remmy."

"…. What did you just call me?"

"I don't know how my heart can take this. I shall never get over your betrayal—"

"What did you call me?"

"—I mean, I might actually start crying, right now, Remmy, and it's all your—"

"_What did you call me?"_

"—Borrow a tissue? Because I am just—"

"Here."

"Why thank you," Sirius reached for the hanky and tensed up as the sensation of frigid water being thrown over his head washed over him. He gave its owner a sharp look, "That was mean of you."

She shrugged, "It shut you up. Now why did you want to meet me?"

"I dunno, you're the Nameless Dead Female who talked to Madelyn, why not be curious?"

The ghost went dangerously still, "You mean to tell me… that you came here, annoyed the_ hell out of me,_ all because you were _bored and curious?_ And on top of that, I'm called the _Nameless Dead Female?"_

"Well when you put it that way…"

_"OUT!" _she surged toward them.

Sirius smirked, "You're a ghost; you can't hurt me."

Eyes re-narrowed, "No. but I can do _this!_"

The ghost began to beat Sirius with her hanky, dousing him in a torrid feeling again and again.

"Alright! Alright!" Sirius cried, but the girl didn't stop, and hoarded the marauders out of the library.

"OUT!" she gave the final screech as the first years tumbles onto the stair case.

Remus turned around, "Wait—what's your name?"

"What does it matter to you?" She folded her arms sulkily.

"Well, we need something to call you."

She paused for a moment before saying, "I don't have a name anymore. But the students call me 'Icey'."

And with that, she turned and walked into a wall.

_**Fwahaha…I love being a psychotic bitchy ghost.**_

**And I enjoy making you one. This is my apology to all of you guys for not updating in forever. The next one will be up on St. Patrick's Day.**

**Happy Valentines Day.**


	11. Peter Enters

Wow! Time jump!

* * *

><p>The Marauders tumbled into their dorm room, laughing about their latest prank. Already it was known as the Infamous Banana Incident. McGonagall had been positively livid after, when asking who had done it, Madelyn had used a spell to write <em>"Who do you think?" <em>in brilliant, flaming letters above the tables. So it seemed to be the start of a great day!

Sirius wiped a tear from his eye as he plopped onto James's bed, "Oh Merlin, that was brilliant!"

James collapsed forwards onto his pillow and agreed, "It's so bloody perfect! No one would suspect innocent little first years to have caused such a ruckus!"

"Chocolate is in order!" Remus announced, throwing pieces at everyone.

"Success!" Madelyn crowed. "Lashings of ginger beer for everyone! I'm British, you know!"

Remus stared back at her, "Bloody hell, Madelyn, you need to work on your accent."

"Shut up, you damn, bloody wanker."

The all gathered on James's bed, plotting their next move while they were still floating on their pranking high.

"Okay," James began, "So our next prank is on Halloween, agreed?"

"Agreed!" They chorused.

"Right, so do we want—"

James's voice was cut off by something very unfortunate, sudden, and just down- right scary.

For it was at that moment a watery-eyed boy popped up out of nowhere.

"So, it's _you _blokes who have been causing everything!"

XxXxXxXxX

Two centaurs were looking up at the sky, reading each glint and glimmer.

"It breaks my heart to listen tonight."

The male with long unruly red hair looked at his partner in surprise, "Why? The human world doesn't affect us; their troubles are not of our concern."

The fair centaur smiled faintly, "Aren't they? Perhaps not in the past, but I wonder… what will come next…"

XxXxXxXxX

_"HOLY SHIT!"_

The marauder's reactions were instantaneous. James scrambled backwards and yanked the covers over his head while Sirius let out a, _ahem_, very manly screech as he dove off the edge of the bed, accidentally knocking Madelyn over with him.

Remus, on the other hand, snatched up a pillow and held it as high as he could, taking a protective stance over the remaining pile of chocolate. He stared intently at the poor intruder whose eyes had gone very wide indeed.

Said poor soul let out a squeak and clamped his hands over his mouth.

A blanket of silence covered the room until everyone heard someone grunt.

Looking over his own shoulder, Remus could see Madelyn start to drag herself up over the edge of the bed. It wasn't going all that well for her for some reason, and Remus saw why a second later. She managed to get her head over the side, and Remus could see that Sirius' leg was hanging over her shoulder and weighing her down. Both first years were attempting to climb up at the same time and kept getting in each other's way.

After several failed attempts, they managed to get untangled and both scrambled back onto the bed. Madelyn let out a breath and straightened her shirt while Sirius tried to fix his hair.

"I- I'm so s-sorry, I- I didn't mean—"

The round boy stopped attempting to speak when Sirius suddenly leapt off the mattress and grabbed the nuisance by the front of his shirt. The dark haired boy leaned towards his face, eyes daring the fool to talk.

He snarled, "What. Do. You. Think. You. Are. Doing?"

"I- eb- edah—" he sputtered unhelpfully.

Remus was suddenly behind Sirius, and gently pried his hands away from the blonde stranger. He pushed his friend back to the bed and held up his palms in the universal "calm down" gesture.

"Now," he glanced at the intruder, "Name?"

"P-Peter Pettigrew."

"House?"

"Gryffindor."

"Year?"

"F-First."

The marauders all exchanged looks.

Remus turned back to Peter, "Why are you here?"

This was a crucial question, but it only seemed to confuse the boy, "Um… I sleep here…" It sounded like a question.

The marauders all exchanged glances again as Remus felt his eyebrows shoot up in surprise, "Since when?"

"Since the beginning of school!" He was really confused now.

Remus turned his head to look at his friends and saw that they were all wearing the same look of shock.

Peter piped up, seemingly undeterred by their reactions to his presence, "But, you blokes are the ones who have been messing with the school! That's bloody brilliant! No one would believe that _first years _managed to pull that off! How did you—"

"Shhh!" Madelyn stopped him midsentence with a violent hiss. "Shhh sh-sh-sh-shhhhh…" her hands flung out in a "shut up" motion. "Marauders meeting, now!"

Remus climbed into the bed next to the other marauders and closed the curtains in the face of the lost looking child. The group turned to each, except for Madelyn, who popped her head out and made shooing motions at Peter, "Ch-Chh!"

When he had retreated far back enough for her satisfaction, Madelyn popped back into the pitch-black space.

"Okay, so—"

"Wait! Someone's touching me!"

"Oh, suck it up, you prosy!"

"Er, I think he was talking about me…"

"Ah! Who was that?"

"Who could it be, it's me!"

"James?"

"No, I'm James."

"Ow! You just hit me!"

"No, I didn't."

"Get your hand off my butt."

"Sorry. It does that."

"Oh no!"

"What?"

"I can't find my chocolate!"

"Oh, for the love of Merlin, we've got bigger problems than chocolate, what are we going to do about Peter?"

"We could always murder him."

"We can't kill him, you stupid yank."

"I agree with Sirius, I refuse to commit murder."

"I mean, really! There would be too much evidence against us, so we would never get away with it, and that completely defeats the purpose! I don't exactly want to go to Azkaban quite yet—"

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me! And stop laughing, James."

"Sorry. Not really."

"Well, what are we going to do with him? He's a liability, if he lets Professor Dumbledore know about us, we are in so much trouble and our plans are ruined!"

"I could murder Dumbledore."

"Madelyn, stop that!"

"Is their anyway to force him to be quiet? Terrify him into silence?"

"If the roles were reversed, but he's kinda the one who has dirt on us."

"Wipe his memory?"

"Too inhumane, I'm not doing it."

"Well, you know, we really only need him to keep quiet until the next prank."

"Yes, but we can't trust him!"

"He's a liability! He could over-hear _all_ of our pranks and let people know about them!"

"I can't believe we didn't notice someone who has been living in the same room as us for over a month."

"I can't believe the spare bed was never really empty."

"I can't believe we all fit on this bed."

"I can't believe you have yet to get your hand off my butt."

"Oops, my bad."

"Mates, focus! We need a long-term solution where we can be certain that Peter Pettigrew will not be a lapse in our security!"

It became so quiet you could literally hear the click in everyone's head at the same time.

"Oh, bloody hell…"

"I could murder a tea pot right now."

"Madelyn!"

"Sorry."

XxXxXxXxX

Sirius was the one who withdrew the bed curtain, revealing Peter Pettigrew to the marauders. Blinking to help his eyes adjust to the bright light, the young Black leaned against a bed post, not looking at the boy. His eyes went to James, who was trying to communicate with his friend by using shrugs, glances, and his eyebrows. It may have just been the time of day, but Sirius just did not understand. "What?"

James shook his head and mouthed, "Never mind."

Remus was interrogating Pettigrew again, "What do you plan to do now, eh?"

"Err, I dunno, I hadn't really thought—"

"You plan to tell McGonagall?"

"What? No! I-"

Sirius tuned them out and turned his gaze to Madelyn. She returned it steadily, reading his expression.

"It'll be okay; it won't be that bad. He may even turn out to be fun. You'll see," she whispered.

Sirius sighed, but turned to watch Remus and Peter none the less.

It seemed that the shock was starting to wear off the boy, and he was currently pleading his innocence to Remus, "—Why would I tell someone? I _like_ your pranks! If I told McGonagall or Dumbledore, it would do nothing for me!"

Sirius gave up on listening again. Instead, the eleven-year-old worked on wrapping his head around this sudden change. Sirius Black did not like change, especially the type that he had no hand in. He liked things his way, everything the way he wanted it, and without annoying, useless people getting in the way. Screw compromises, why couldn't he have it all?

Sirius knew that after having Peter join them for their next prank and then ditching him afterwards was a definite possibility. The Black heir found a certain pleasure at the idea of chewing him up and spitting him back out, but the others might not, so Sirius needed to be prepared for the long-term agreement. After a moment of thought, the dark-haired boy decided to leave it up to Peter. Pettigrew would have to prove himself first.

Sirius was snapped out of his train of thought when Remus turned back around with a smile, "Everyone, say hello to our new marauder!"

_Beta's omake_

"I can't believe we all fit on this bed."

"I can't believe you have yet to get your hand off my butt."

"Oops, my bad."

"I can't believe how much this sounds like the beginning of a fanfiction yaoi orgy."

There was dead silence, before the others burst into conversation.

"Oh _God, _Madelyn!" James cried. "That's sick!"

Sirius lowered his head into Remus's shoulder and covered his ears (unknowingly proving Madelyn's point). "This can never be unheard." Because of his position, he was the only one who felt Remus's apathetic shrug.

However, the rest of them _did _hear what Remus had to say about Madelyn's topic. "That's just what I was thinking, actually. Madelyn, do you want to co-write something like that?" An unseen smirk. "This is just giving me a whole bunch of plotbunnies."

Sirius flew away, nearly falling off the bed. "What the hell—you're a _fanboy, _Remus!?" The shock in his voice was fairly palpable.

Again, Remus shrugged. "So?"

James let out a whimper.

Then Remus felt an unsure hand on his arm—and then someone's hand wrapped around his shoulders and tugged him close. After a second he realized that it was Madelyn—after all, he was _fairly _certain neither James nor Sirius had curves like that.

"_You and I, Remus," _Madelyn whispered into his ear, "_Will get along _just _fine."_

Remus was surprisingly ok with this.

**This is why you shouldn't leave us alone for so long- things like that are created! Wait, that's not actually that bad….**

**And what the hell do you mean by "Curves like that?!"**

**Ice: I'm pretty sure neither James nor Sirius has boobs, West. Just saying.**

Well…..

btw, in case you didn't get it before, when Madelyn was 'fine with bugs', that was the song 'I Feel Fine' by the Beatles.

West Pharaoh

P.S. This is your capitan speaking. Hehe. Hehehe.


End file.
